Today, my 50-year-old mother borrowed my denim miniskirt to go to the bar. In return, she offered to let me borrow her red "f*** me" pumps whenever I needed them. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my mom decided to do something new and borrowed some of my clothes. She's currently wearing a very small pair of short shorts and a very tight tank top. We're going to a very prestigious golf course and she won't change. FML
Today, my mom ended up having a midlife crisis. She decided it was finally time to get those tight leather pants that she has always wanted, and is now planning on putting a stripper pole in her room. FML
Today, while cleaning my car, I found my mother's underwear in the backseat. She'd borrowed my car last weekend because hers had been in the shop and she'd been called in to work. I see she put in for overtime. FML
Today, my mother asked me if she could borrow $200. Being the lovely daughter I am, I gave her my bank card to withdraw it herself. She gambled it away and maxed my bank account out. I had $1500 saved. FML
Today, my mother had a full-on hissy fit because of the clothes I was wearing. Not because she thought they were inappropriate, but because I was "stealing her look." FML
Today, I told my mom about the $50 I'd hidden in case of an emergency, and how I couldn't find it. She said she'd borrowed it last week. FML
Today, my mother "borrowed" money from my stash to help pay for her vacation to the Dominican Republic. The same trip I'm not allowed to go on. FML
Today, I had to explain to my 65-year-old mother that it is inappropriate for her to walk around in front of me in her underwear. Her response? "Too bad." FML
Today, I asked my mom to buy me new shorts. She bought fluffy bubble shorts. I'm a 20 year-old guy. FML
Today, I found why exactly my clothes always seemed more stretched out after about a week of owning them. My mom steals and wears them when she goes clubbing. My mom is 46, twice my size, and gets out more than me. FML
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Top comments
carmoniam 0
HAHAHAHA **** ME PUMPS.
ThatDarnCat 0
I don't see how this is a FML. Your mom's ******* cool.
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Comments (100)
Darrus 0
OP is Stifler's sister
moonshine_bek 2
No pumps say "**** me". They are too safe.
moonshine_bek 2
Edit: Clearly that phrase has not reached Britain. When we mean stilletos we say stilletos.
sublime420 11
Are you sure? Because Amy Winehouse has a song called "**** Me Pumps" And last time i checked, she was British...
yeahthatsrite 0
what the pants? why would you let her borrow your skirt?
confucious 0
holy crap! run for z hills.
G_thelegend 0
you and your mother are the same size. FYL
gabstahhh 8
I honestly don't see the problem here...it seems like you guys are comfortable with each other. that's a good thing...
omgcookeys 15
since I can read this 2 years later, I think you've failed.
purebliss7 6
the only way this would be a FML is if she was getting more action/ reaction wearing your mini skirt.
emogiggles 0
I agree with 92