Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Today, I received a text message from my wife, who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends, saying, "I have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you in the morning." Umm… His? FML
Today, the girl I like said she was out drinking with a friend. I'm pretty sure she has been lying about all the times she has "fallen asleep" and could not talk, and is actually seeing other people. FML
Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML
Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my mother at 3 in the morning. She had been out drinking and couldn't drive. She parties more than I do. FML
Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML
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Top comments
linshenjie321 0
**** her man , she is a hoe
tren94 0
but see going to a party as the only girl and then calling at 2am DRUNK would make anybody worry. trust isn't such a big part of the equation when booze is added in.
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Comments (52)
SAINTSFANUSA 3
KARMA will get her
stax23 5
It's 2:23 AM right now! Awesome!
sarahhiiwantt 16
I'm normally the only girl at my friends parties too. I just have mainly guy friends it's not like anything happens. Girls get labeled way too quickly once they're seen with a bunch if guys. It doesn't mean anything is happening it just means those are who their friends are.
martin8337 36
I'll bet.
fantasyworld 39
Did she invite you?
tanishpradhan 20
She's in a gay bar.. I guarantee it.
I'madumbass 19
It's this thing called jealousy. I think she has a lot of male friends and a couple of them invited her to this thing. And maybe something happened in your relationship to make her feel that way. So, at least it's working...?
I'madumbass 19
I think she has a lot of male friends and a couple of them invited her to this party. I think something happened in your relationship to make her feel that way. So, I guess it's working...?