Today, is my 16th birthday. Thinking that my parents would be out of town for it like they had every other year, I decided it would be fun to tan nude in my backyard. Apparantly my parents set up a surprise party for my sweet 16. I was standing naked infront of half my school. FML
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Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, it's my 16th birthday. My parents forgot about it, and planned a weekend out of town. I was alone on my birthday. FML
Today, it's my 23rd birthday. My family - parents, siblings, and two cousins - asked to visit to help me celebrate. I agreed and spent some time cleaning my place up some. The catch: I relaxed a bit and did it while nude. It felt so nice, I forgot I was nude, so when they came at noon… well, it wasn't the birthday suit I'd hoped they'd see. FML
Today, was my 16th birthday and I was supposed to be surprised with a new car. I have overheard my parents talking about bringing it home tonight while I was at a friend's house. We snuck back to my house to see them bring my car home. All I saw was my Dad crash my new car into a street lamp. FML
Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML
Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML
Today, I decided to tan naked in a secluded part of my yard, so I wouldn't get tan lines. I even felt adventurous enough to leave my bikini and towel inside. This idea backfired however when my mom stopped home from work, assumed I wasn't home, and locked all the doors before she left again. FML
Today, was my 16th birthday. Needless to say, I was delighted when my friends presented me with a birthday card in a homeroom. I pretended to be surprised and exclaimed, "Aw, you guys really shouldn't have!" They didn't. It was our teacher's birthday. They just wanted me to sign the card. FML
Today, I was woken up by my family surrounding me with breakfast in bed and "Sweet 16" balloons. My birthday is in 3 months, and I'll be 17. FML
Today, I was at my sixteenth birthday party. My guests consisted of my grandma who I live with, and my 2-year-old cousin she was babysitting. FML
Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year-olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML
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Top comments
reader1 0
Well, on a plus side...at least your parents started to care 16 years late?
lolol182 4
pelvic thrust?
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Comments (177)
jpabely 0
bs, seriously.
xolotl 0
you usually don't find out until the day of that your parents are out of town?
cyndyv 0
thats gotta suck....haha kinda funny thow total FML for sure i mean..did the party still continue? haha
KyRidHEART 0
*though (~:
KyleOkposofan 0
Well if you go outside naked, you risk this happening.
JediMindTricksWS 2
Do you often tan nude? where do you live? Oh wait you're only 16, n/m
pommeblossom 0
Why would you decide to lay outside naked on your birthday?
imortal20 0
Birthday self sex
wrestler_fml 0
You better have had a giant c*ck, because girls have ****-star like expectations, and if they see an average-sized d*ck on somebody they don't already like, they'll surely be turned off. how do I know? Don't ask. ...sister troubles. haha my sis saw me coming out of the shower and laughed, until i pointed out that mine erect was just over 6", which (to her sad surprise) was above average, by .3 inches. She then proceeded to say she hoped her b/f wasn't like that or she'd dump him, and also that all the girls she knew thought that as well, except those who were disappointed when they saw THEIR boyfriends d*cks! its funny girls dont put 2 and 2 together. but at any rate, this guy is screwed unless he delivered.
soohungry 0
#21, I'm sure other people have told you already...but you're freakin' retarded...I live in Florida and I'm pretty damn sure it's not snowing here.
mich23 10
how do you (#38) know if its a girl or guy, b/c it doesnt say, so u r assuming. And its more likely to be a girl b/c more girls go tanning than guys
mlipro 0
You fail. Under the FML it says the OP's username and gender.
Sir_Naff 0
Oh, #21, is where you live the only place in the world?? It was 90 degrees out here in Tucson, and some people live in the mysterious "Southern Hemisphere" where Summer is just coming to an end.