Transportation: Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons...

By CB4 - 05/02/2009 22:34 - United States

Today, I woke up to my car covered in shaving cream and tampons and the word CHEATER written on my windshield in lipstick. The guy a few doors down from me in my dorm has the same car as me. I'm a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 635

You deserved it 2 451

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Same thing different taste

By GuiltByTenuousAssociation - 01/03/2010 13:17 - United States

Today, I parked and noticed a car that was identical to mine across from me. I thought it was an amusing coincidence until I came back to find both cars trashed. At least the vandal realized their mistake and left a note saying, "You deserve it for having the same car as that cheater, asshole!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 389

You deserved it 2 826

Caught in 4K

By BrutallyBlonde - 31/12/2009 00:03 - United States

Today, I went to egg my ex-boyfriend's house, after finding out he cheated on me. I covered his house and car with eggs, toilet paper, and silly string. When I went to get back in my car, my keys were locked inside, the alarm went off, and my ex walked outside, with his new girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 844

You deserved it 56 766

By Mel Hahn - 17/09/2017 16:00

Today, I walked out of my boyfriend's house to see my car window smashed in and my steering wheel cover stolen. I was only staying at his place because there had been a rash of vehicle break-ins in my neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 704

You deserved it 277

By gkline09 - 06/08/2009 05:28 - United States

Today, I walked out to my car to see a broken window, a bunch of stuff missing, egg shells, and a note that read "stop banging my boyfriend". I haven't had anyone in over a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 081

You deserved it 3 083

By FuckedByLife - 12/02/2017 19:00 - United Kingdom - Bridgend

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend of two years was cheating on me. How? His other girlfriend crashed her car into mine and had him pick her up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 918

You deserved it 559

By rplovez - 05/09/2011 23:14 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 294

You deserved it 4 018

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 388

You deserved it 4 257

By Anonymous - 12/08/2019 04:01

Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 502

You deserved it 123

My dear neighbor

By Anonymous - 22/02/2020 18:00

Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 282

You deserved it 131

Road rage gone feral

By 16590 - 15/06/2012 22:13 - Sweden

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 327

You deserved it 4 844

myname_fml 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 11:20

How do you know the poster isn't a female? Plus, I don't think there's anything wrong with being a virgin in college. Just saying.

LemonLolly 10

Friday 21 December 2012 0:25

You don't have to be a non-virgin to be a cheater

Comments

myname_fml 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 11:20

How do you know the poster isn't a female? Plus, I don't think there's anything wrong with being a virgin in college. Just saying.

rockinbecca2 4

Saturday 29 October 2011 17:12

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

Shadowvoid 33

Saturday 27 October 2012 7:19

You are a virgin and 15 I assume. If not, way to be a ***** :) you really give hope to this generation. (Sarcasm) You have no business making fun of these guys, some people believe virginity actually means something. You can't really make fun of people for having good morals.

Shadowvoid 33

Saturday 27 October 2012 7:24

You can't make fun of someone for being a virgin, some people actually have good morals and believe in means something. You just look idiotic trying to point out someone is a virgin, big deal. You don't give this generation a lot of hope.

keyofdestiny13 24

Monday 9 March 2015 7:20

#12, the OP is male. It says so on the FML.

kate7 0

Tuesday 10 February 2009 7:04

#6 your response is just dumb. they said they were a virgin because obviously it wasn't them because they didn't cheat. and no, dumb girls key cars and smash shit. smart girls do stupid little things consistantly that will just ruin even 5 minutes of your day. they are smart enough not to do something they will have to pay for..especially paying for a whole new paint job.

nava1210 12

Saturday 26 November 2011 19:43

Just because he's a virgin doesn't mean that he didn't cheat. You can cheat by simply going out with another person other than your boyfriend/girlfriend and mess around with them

blah_blah_shity 0

Wednesday 11 February 2009 9:52

#14... weeds alright! and that has nothing to do with anything. that sucks ur car was ******. make sure everyone knows that it was your car. mybe the chick will feel bad and do you a favor LOL

jorma_fml 0

Thursday 19 February 2009 20:10

So get the girl's phone number and start dating her!

julzziee 0

Friday 13 March 2009 0:48

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

CoDandBlowjobs 8

Friday 8 November 2013 0:45

****. Some people have morals.

ttoriiii 10

Tuesday 22 September 2015 20:41

What does one have anything to do with the other?

craigahh 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 6:04

This is the same as a Jason Blaine music video.

thedevilsworkday 0

Monday 8 June 2009 4:41

# 14: think about where the world would be without sex or pot dealers. not a place i want to be a part of.

shnibz101 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 6:51

Idk how being a lesbian has any to do with this FML but ok that sucks

judemeister 0

Friday 13 November 2009 16:04

you made me lol. there is soooo much i could say to this... for one thing, there's this magical thing called a CONDOM. there's also; don't sleep with sk*nks in the first place, you don't need to be a virgin to get serious with a woman (unless she is highly religious), and funnily enough, one night stands and such will not suddenly turn a man into a drug dealer. oh, and how the sk*nk will sleep around "because he knocked her up"? i didn't realise pregnancy compelled women to sleep around. haha. seriously though, you actually made me lol. feel proud.