By FuckedByLife - United Kingdom - Bridgend Today, I discovered that my boyfriend of two years was cheating on me. How? His other girlfriend crashed her car into mine and had him pick her up. FML I agree, your life sucks 8815 You deserved it 541 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By stankness - United States Today, I had to endure a long face-to-face conversation with a coworker who had fierce BO. He had his fingers interlaced around the back of his head the whole time. FML I agree, your life sucks 34246 You deserved it 2772 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ENDmySUFFERING - United Kingdom - Southampton Today, I walked into my son's room to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML I agree, your life sucks 11171 You deserved it 1282 26 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cookiemonster - South Africa - Johannesburg Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML I agree, your life sucks 45336 You deserved it 6649 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Broke - Australia - Melbourne Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 29959 You deserved it 3378 184 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 6u174r_d00d - United States Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML I agree, your life sucks 40936 You deserved it 6051 347 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SisterOfTard - United States - Florence Today, my brother offered me $20 to practice his kissing on me for his date later this evening. FML I agree, your life sucks 47333 You deserved it 4676 168 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By father of the year - United States Today, my 18-year-old daughter texted me and told me that she got in a car crash. She texted, "I forgot wich way wus left lol" and then quickly added "yolo right? Lol". FML I agree, your life sucks 64328 You deserved it 11814 231 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By blocked_by_fire - United States - Pullman Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML I agree, your life sucks 32573 You deserved it 4470 152 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By No O-face - United States Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't give me a hand job because "it's awfully wet down there," and he isn't "a fan of other people's bodily fluids." FML I agree, your life sucks 33687 You deserved it 6409 120 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By DrtySnchez - United States - Statham Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML I agree, your life sucks 57846 You deserved it 3630 190 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By black and yellow - United States - Salinas Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML I agree, your life sucks 23752 You deserved it 45568 67 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By clashgurl8449 Today, my boyfriend fed me chocolate chip cookies with laxatives in them because he was concerned I did not poop enough. FML I agree, your life sucks 40324 You deserved it 4243 131 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lovehurts - United States - Wayne Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML I agree, your life sucks 53667 You deserved it 6110 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada - Brampton Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML I agree, your life sucks 40688 You deserved it 16669 122 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - United States Today, I went to feed my neighbor's cat while he was out of town. The cat was sick, so part of my job was to give it a pill each time I came. Cats don't like swallowing pills. My neighbor forgot to mention that his cat wasn't declawed. I was wearing shorts. FML I agree, your life sucks 27362 You deserved it 6186 168 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By AGluckily - United States Today, I was with a group of friends at a bar, and we were all talking about whether we were moaners, screamers, or quiet during sex. My boyfriend said that he was a moaner, which I contradicted. Completely straightfaced, he said, "Well, I am when it's good." FML I agree, your life sucks 74315 You deserved it 24674 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By notateen - United States Today, I was shopping with my baby daughter when an older woman came up to me. She glared and said, "You know, if you kids learned how to keep your legs closed, you wouldn't be a mother at 16." I'm 25. FML I agree, your life sucks 43999 You deserved it 4004 313 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML I agree, your life sucks 33027 You deserved it 3567 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Gas-pingForAir - United States - Columbia Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 12680 You deserved it 1642 46 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By master baiter - United States - Brooklyn Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML I agree, your life sucks 30829 You deserved it 43557 97 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By kbartlett86 - Canada Today, after sitting for hours at my desk, my legs fell asleep. When I got up to go to the bathroom on my break, I couldn't walk properly and leaned against things so I wouldn't fall over. My supervisor then came over and started lecturing me about being drunk at work. FML I agree, your life sucks 35350 You deserved it 4595 88 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By V.. - 8/11/2020 20:58 - South Africa Bored Today, I still have no idea why I got married. All my wife does is drink Coke and watch TV. Perhaps the silver lining is that she's not doing coke in powder form. FML I agree, your life sucks 722 You deserved it 329 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tuppu - Finland Today, waking up I noticed that my female boss had texted me during the night, telling me she wants me bad. I'm a woman, happily married to a man, and now have to turn her down somehow and not get fired in the process. FML I agree, your life sucks 38026 You deserved it 3340 201 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By rubber_duckie177 - United States Today, my sisters and I were throwing my mom a birthday party. Since I'm not good at baking, I ordered her a really nice and expensive cake. As my daughter and I were headed out the door, she told me she had added some sprinkles to make it pretty. It was the silica beads from a package. FML I agree, your life sucks 36915 You deserved it 3997 124 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tumblrinas_at_work - United States - Woodland Hills Today, I had to go to a boring, never-ending "sensitivity training" session, all because my douchebag coworker filed a complaint against me last week after I apologized for being tardy. Apparently I was insulting people with mental disorders. Or as she put it, "differently-abled" people. FML I agree, your life sucks 30670 You deserved it 2947 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Username Today, my boyfriend punched a hole in a door. This is on top of the broken handle, cracked sink top, dented fridge, and other holes in the wall he has also made. We are 4 months into our year lease. I don't think we are getting our $720 deposit back. FML I agree, your life sucks 27570 You deserved it 18807 317 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was sitting on the couch with my little brother. He was looking at me and says "so cool." I asked him what was so cool and he says "it's not that cool but, your eyebrow connects to your other eyebrow". FML I agree, your life sucks 36092 You deserved it 13356 111 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Las Vegas Today, while driving home, I saw a cop with a speed gun "hidden" by the side of the road. I went to slow down so the fuck-knob wouldn't be able to ticket me. I then had a brain-fart and floored the gas instead of hitting the brakes. Hello speeding ticket. FML I agree, your life sucks 12970 You deserved it 29306 78 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By I weep for our future generation Today, while home from college for the weekend, my sister started whining about how I keep using "big fancy college words" and making her feel bad. My sister is 27 and teaches elementary school. The word I used was "ludicrous." FML I agree, your life sucks 3955 You deserved it 282 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - United States Today, I went into my office and told my boss that I hated my job and was quitting on the spot. I tried to leave quickly but I slipped and fell on the marble floor right in front of everybody during my exit. FML I agree, your life sucks 23069 You deserved it 6290 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML I agree, your life sucks 12124 You deserved it 41958 67 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By textraped - United States Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML I agree, your life sucks 55129 You deserved it 40507 69 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anon - Australia Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML I agree, your life sucks 36100 You deserved it 14465 200 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dirk855 - United States Today, I crashed into a ditch on my way home from work. I had to walk 2 miles in -25 below zero weather before I could pick up a cell phone signal to call a tow truck. When I got back to my car, a cop was waiting for me with a ticket for leaving the scene of an accident. FML I agree, your life sucks 28347 You deserved it 2315 33 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Sammijane58 Today, I watched my best friend get married. I then watched her completely ignore my maid of honor speech, because she was messing with the lights behind us. FML I agree, your life sucks 1497 You deserved it 206 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mylifesucks - United States Today, I found out that my 2 week Christmas vacation my boss was talking about wasn't for this year, but 2010. I spent the day with my husband cancelling flights to Florida, and explaning to my 8 year old why we were not going to Disney World. FML I agree, your life sucks 37363 You deserved it 4931 75 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML I agree, your life sucks 50047 You deserved it 7957 67 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Recovering Alcoholic - United Kingdom - Kettering Today, half of my motivation to stop drinking is so that my tolerance will go down, because I currently can't actually afford enough alcohol to get even tipsy anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 29403 You deserved it 12707 70 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - London Today, I got roped into a volunteering thing at the last minute. I was waiting outside with all these kids who looked hungry. Feeling bad, I passed around crisps and cookies. Turns out we were at a convention to promote healthy eating in malnourished children. FML I agree, your life sucks 33505 You deserved it 6075 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By elow72 - United States - Nashua Today, I woke up at 3:45 AM to fly to Pittsburgh to sample classes at a university there. After all that flying and sitting in traffic for 2 hours, I finally got to attend to my first class. I fell asleep during it. FML I agree, your life sucks 18412 You deserved it 5503 45 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By cowduck7 | 11 #7409187 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:06 That shit is crazy Send a private message 85 3 Reply
By AirBusDriver | 23 #7409188 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:07 Must be a small town? Send a private message 56 3 Reply
By cowduck7 | 11 #7409187 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:06 That shit is crazy Send a private message 85 3 Reply
Reply bigred121970 | 10 #7410093 - Tuesday 14 February 2017 10:23 I'm new to this. I accidentally flagged on Of your comments. Sorry. I did let FML Know. Send a private message 3 2 Reply
By AirBusDriver | 23 #7409188 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:07 Must be a small town? Send a private message 56 3 Reply
By _parth | 20 #7409189 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:14 He can pick both of y'all up!! Send a private message 22 2 Reply
By Monday_funday | 25 #7409210 - Sunday 12 February 2017 20:32 Wow that's so shitty luck OP. Your ex is an asshat Send a private message 2 1 Reply
By RichardPencil | 29 #7409221 - Sunday 12 February 2017 21:00 Did you get rear-ended or T-boned? What happened in the crash? Send a private message 2 11 Reply
By toxicLover28 | 19 #7409273 - Sunday 12 February 2017 22:20 1 vagina wasn't good enough for him? Send a private message 9 4 Reply
Reply scyth3s | 13 #7409831 - Monday 13 February 2017 22:12 Not enough for most men, biologically speaking. expecting a lifetime of sexual exclusivity is silly imo, and I don't know why people do it. Send a private message 1 3 Reply
By pjsr | 32 #7409282 - Sunday 12 February 2017 22:35 Her post: Today, I ran into my boyfriend's girlfriend. Literally. Send a private message 21 0 Reply
Reply aredvulpix | 23 #7409579 - Monday 13 February 2017 12:37 To be fair, her car also got crashed Send a private message 0 1 Reply
By katluvr | 22 #7409364 - Monday 13 February 2017 1:08 Did she know about you? Did she crash into your car on purpose, or was this a really freaky occurrence? Send a private message 6 1 Reply
By nonsensical | 26 #7409397 - Monday 13 February 2017 2:27 What I'm wondering is did you tell him about the accident and asked if he could pick you up too? 10 0 Reply
By Hippo_Holiday | 19 #7409443 - Monday 13 February 2017 5:44 It was a sign Send a private message 0 0 Reply
Today, I had the house to myself for the morning. I decided to enjoy being alone, so pulled my trusty bullet vibrator from the drawer. I was very much... I agree, your life sucks 578 You deserved it 130 7 Comments
Today, I came early from my job, just to find my boyfriend in bed, with my dad. FML I agree, your life sucks 1036 You deserved it 52 6 Comments