By xBubbles38 - 18/07/2011 15:17 - United States

Today, I woke up to a scream downstairs. My 13 year-old daughter was trying to bite her little brother's neck. No matter how hard I try, she will not believe that she is NOT and NEVER WILL BE a vampire. FML
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vote type 1 6 282

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be careful when she steps outside—she might start to sparkle.

Bring her in the sun and ask her to explain why she is not sparkling like a glorious homosexual!

Comments

CadaverFart 0

make her eat garlic and see if she dies

mintcar 9

345, my comment isn't thumbed down. Also I did not copy it from a tweet. I don't even use Twitter. I copied and pasted it from my best friend's status. It's a Stephen King quote and I'm allowed to use it, so shut it.

The books /are/ **** shite, lol, they're worth shit compared to many other books and movies. The Host was much better. Twilight had absolutely no substance to it at all - no depth, no meaning, nothing. It's true. A dumb bitch has to choose between being necrophilia or **********. Not to mention, the 4th book was even more impossible because vampires, due to their lack of blood flow, cannot get boners. Therefore no sex, and no babies.

lilai1396 0

Now now what type of vampire? Sparklepire?HoN vampire with a crescent moon on her head?Maybe a VA moroi or dhampir? Strigoi? Dracula style? Van Helsing kind? We need answers here. Okay I would love to be a VA or HoN type of vamp but really, vampires like that don't exist. There are people who drink blood however? P.S She starts sparkling you might want to put her on the curb. She could turn in to a pedopixie.

johnnie254 7

see what twilight has done to us?

MrLefty 8

And this is why Twilight is a shame to society

beauty2646 0

Bwhaha, I'm sorry but this is too funny. On a side note show her the movie "The Lost Boys" and I'm sure she'll never want to be a vampire aga

298 - what I meant! but it is is 90 minutes.