Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML
Today, my professor called me out in the middle of a lecture to ask why I was bleeding. I then had to explain to him, in front of around one hundred of my fellow classmates, that my largest zit had burst. FML
Today, I got so bored that I drew a face on my index finger, and made a video of me garrotting it with a string. I ended up rupturing a blood vessel, and had to think up a cover story for my girlfriend to explain my screaming. FML
Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML
Today, I had a nosebleed at work after having recent surgery. As I was walking to the bathroom, I tripped and fell, sending blood splattering everywhere. My manager, who was walking by, looked at me and said, “You’re really committed to the bit.” I was too embarrassed to respond. FML
Today, I had the longest, bloodiest, bloody nose ever when I was at work. I got blood on a few materials as I was running to the restroom. I work in a food factory, so everything had to be sanitized and thrown out. Now management wants me to pay for everything we had to throw out. FML
Today, I had to leave class early due to a profusely bleeding pimple on my forehead. FML
Today, I got to my human anatomy class with a hickey on my neck. Since I sit in the front row, my professor noticed and decided to call me to the front. He then started talking about ruptured blood vessels and hickeys, all while as I served as the subject. FML
Today, I was listening to some music before school started, which is why I didn't hear my teacher sneak up behind me. When she laid her hand on my shoulder, of course I accidentally punch her in the face. Her nose bled. FML
Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
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Top comments
MrFancy 0
I thought that was a pretty good idea. Sorry.
manda_baby_rawr 4
That's actually a pretty good idea...too bad people are stupid and overreact all the time. -.-'
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Comments (232)
WeTheLiving 4
that sucks!! Nowadays you can't express anger/fear etc. in any form without someone telling you "if you want to talk, my door is always open." talk about sucking the creativity out of me.... Will it ever be safe for us to mention blood, guns, violence, racism without appearing like we condone all of those things (*sigh wistful thinking)
vfs_fml 0
hahahahah
IHHC 2
doortje, haha tuurlijk weet ik dat, lekker toch?
Hippie6 0
haha. schools dont like emo fags :p
Hippie6 0
haha. schools dont like emo fags :p
notsofriendly 17
on one hand, that sucks. on the other, you should really know better. on the other, nobody really likes emo art anyway. yes i have three hands.
RemixV4 1
That really sucks. That happened to my bud when he used his name for a character that commited suicide on a short story test.
zach055 23
This is a perfect example of paranoid people making the world bad for the rest of us. "Blood on a knife is art, blood on the ground is art, and blood stains on clothes is the best art of all." -Unknown
zach055 23
I remember one time in my 9th grade English class, we had to write a poem. We could write about anything we wanted and I close death. After writing it, the teacher had everyone come up one at a time to read their poems. When it was my turn, I was so afraid of being labeled as crazy that I didn't read that poem. Instead I just said some stuff about flowers because flowers don't get you labeled as crazy. Watch the movie 6th Sense, in one part of the movie that boy talks about how he drew a picture of "a man stabbing another man with a screw driver." Then he goes on to say, "we had a meeting, mom was crying." Basically people used to draw pictures of guns all the time, but not that can get you arrested. I once heard of a kid who got suspended simply for typing, "How to kill and not get caught" into a Google search on a school computer. Also, you can't even fight kids anymore. In middle school kids would always bother me and it took every ounce of my will power to stop myself from punching them in the face. But if I had let that will power slip just once, i would have been sent to the 'alternative learning center" for two weeks where kids would have been more mean to me and I most likely would have led me to get into another fight, causing me to randomly should, "I'm gonna kill you," which would have caused me to go to jail for making a "death threat." This would have caused me to get into a jailhouse fight which would have caused some to stab me causing me to die. If I'd just had a little less will power I would be dead right now. I once knew a kid who was bullied just as badly as I was, I don;t see him anymore, what if this fate that could have happened to me happened to him?
mason_n97 0
and you are a predator