Today, I woke up, got up, and felt something crunchy under my feet. My son thought it would be funny if he spread cat litter all around the house. Used cat litter. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, I woke up, put on my fuzzy socks, walked down my hallway, and stepped in cat vomit. I took off my now wet socks, continued walking down the hallway, and stepped barefoot in cat shit. FML
Today, my dad thought it would be funny to wake me up by sprinkling catnip over me then dropping my cat on top of me. FML
Today, I woke up and stepped out of bed right into a pile of dog crap. Acting quickly, I jumped on to my other foot, which would have been a great idea, except for this morning there were two piles. FML
Today, as I was laying down to sleep, I grabbed my covers and realized the cat pissed on them and on my body pillow. Now I'm up at 1 a.m. doing laundry so I can have clean bedding and my kids are awake. FML
Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML
Today, I eagerly jumped into a pile of leaves, only to discover via the stench that the neighborhood cats have obviously been using it as their makeshift litter box. FML
Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML
Today, at 6 am, I was suddenly jerked from the warm embraces of sleep by the smell of poo. I was very groggy and confused when my hand landed in something wet and cold. I turned on the light and was horrified to find that my kitten took a huge dump in my bed. It was everywhere. FML
Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML
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Top comments
SkoomaKi 28
It's more of a realistic game of the floor is lava. Join in, it's the best childhood game ever.
Blacksxe 1
Please tell me your son is like 3 years old so this makes sense. I would be very afraid if he was like 18 or 20.
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Comments (74)
Mnemosyne_Love 2
Sounds like a cat fight to me. AHHHAHAHAHHAHHA. Funny? No?.....okay. Just please don't thumb me down. *sad face*.
Crystal55621 19
I really do hate cats. Why would I want to keep a litter box in my house? It's a bin of shit and piss.
SkoomaKi 28
#55 - Rule #56864 states: one must not ask not to be thumbed down, or they will receive down votes.
Dnigz13 4
When he goes to sleep duct tape him to the bed and tell him you thought it was a good idea as a precaution to cat litter on the floor again
trollierthanthou 1
ugh that would irk me to the high hells waking up to that. Would have been worse if it was squishy. Funny, ya' know when i the first part i thought it was dried **** on a towel or some thing. Disgusting either way.
yourmurderscenex 13
i would take you son to the doctor especially if he is really young. touching cat litter + hands in mouth = bad times. but you probably understand that. now get the broom, dust pan, vacuum, mop, disinfectant and get to work! you got a long day ahead of you!
Calyx_fml 22
He wanted you to stop pussyfooting around.
KiddNYC1O 22
Great sense of humor? You must have a pig sty for a house!
cc_the_beast 6
Anyone who takes selfies in the bathroom and says 'YOLO' I have to time for...
chosha_fml 27
Let's see how funny he finds cleaning it up and paying to have the carpets shampooed.