Today, I woke up after a long night of partying. When I went to wash off my face, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My missing tooth was almost enough to make me overlook my black eye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up after a night of partying and went to the bathroom. That’s when I realized that after passing out with my shoes on last night, my friends decided use a black sharpie and play “connect the dots” with my acne. FML
Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep, poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML
Today, I woke up so hungover that when I went to the bathroom and caught sight of myself in the mirror, I screamed, slipped backwards, and smashed my head against the rim of my bathtub. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boss that I was late to work because somehow my hand slipped when I was brushing my teeth, and I hit myself in the eye with the brush. I had to remove my contacts, wash my eye, and find my glasses. He didn't believe me, but at least my eye is minty fresh. FML
Today, I came back to my dormitory after a long shift at work. After using the toilet, I looked at myself in the mirror, only to find a huge piece of food stuck between my front teeth. I work at one of the fanciest restaurants in town; nobody bothered to tell me anything. FML
Today, I woke up to see that I had two black eyes from a cheerleading stunt gone wrong yesterday. I decided to curl my hair to distract from them. While curling my hair I accidentally burned my cheek. I now have two black eyes and a huge burn on my cheek. My extended family is coming tomorrow. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in my workplace's bathroom and caught my reflection in the mirror. I had toothpaste smeared all over my cheek. I spent the rest of the day wondering how many people had noticed and said nothing. FML
Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML
Today, I went out for a few drinks with some friends. All night, I kept smiling and showing off my newly brace-free teeth. Later on, one of my friends drunkly asked, "Why does she keep smiling? Her teeth are fucking jacked." FML
Today, I walked into my near pitch-black bathroom and saw a person staring back at me. I woke my whole family up with my screams. The person was my reflection. FML
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Top comments
SadSadKidd 1
Hangover part 3?
mismonroe 0
Did you happen to wake up in Vegas with a tiger in the bathroom, also?
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Comments (72)
NoobCommenter96 0
Must have been a wild party!!
ICATiger 13
Party hard or GTFO
GoW_Chick 15
Well sounds like someone had an epic night to bad you blacked out, try meditating I hear it can help you recover lost memories
flockz 20
hugging the toilet a little too hard?
bubo_fml 11
Sounds like ya got donkey punched...Have you inspected your arse for any collision damage?
perdix 31
n00b! A donkey punch is to the base of the back of the skull. If you are going to get into ass-*******, learn your proper techniques.
indistructo 3
you must've had a great ******* party :D
perdix 31
I'll bet your boyfriend/husband is relieved that you are telling everyone that you don't know how that happened. This time, make the sammiches right and you can keep the rest of your teeth, OK?
Ilikeurfmls 13
Who ever keeps saying 'ftw' to everything, STOP
olpally 33
Ftw!!! Relax..how about making an actual comment instead of that one..
ICATiger 13
**** the win
Right_Click 12
What a waste of an FML. If you don't know how it got there, you're doing it right.
sharakay79 0
Yeah. Uhm no. Sad copy of the hangover plot. Nice try.