Today, I woke up after a dream where I got it good from none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger. The problem? I'm a guy, and straight. Apparently my subconscious has a fetish for old Austrian bodybuilders. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Dream baby, dream
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML
No no fap season
Today, I had a very hot sex dream about my female coworker. It was so good I woke up practically rock hard, jerked off, and had an amazing orgasm. There’s just one problem: I’m a gay guy, in a committed relationship. FML
Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML
Totally? Really?
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML
Today, I had this amazing dream that a beautiful girl was giving me head. It was getting really hot, so in my dream, I reached down to push on her head, but in real life I actually swung my arm down and punched myself in the balls. FML
Today, I dreamt I had a secret admirer whom I met in person. She had red hair, a plus size body and a beautiful smile. This would've been great if it weren't for the fact I was a straight woman. FML
Today, I woke up from a sexy dream about my boyfriend. Too bad I'd fallen asleep in my living room with my whole family over, grandma included. They were all staring. I'd been sleep humping and moaning. FML
Top comments
rldostie 19
Maybe you're not as straight as you think.
JessieMongoose 11
LMAO.
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Comments (146)
JCLPASCUAL 4
that's something you don't share with the world
LovelyTokyo 0
Were yu the bottom or the top?
chocodrop100 0
I think your subconsious is trying to tell you something, OP.
muzicman25 0
lol
caryhartline 0
wow, you are not straight at all.
teleman 0
Don't worry he'll be back. (Puts on sunglasses)
bizarre_ftw 22
Look don't panic!! You're not gay (though for the record, there's nothing wrong with being gay, op just seems freaked out) you're just in to ********** ^_^ see? Feel better?
bethnoire 10
Maybe it's time to stop clinging to the notion of yourself as "straight" and embrace the idea of sexuality as a spectrum of options which could be very satisfying if you were open to them. But maybe don't start with the Terminator. Not sure he believes in lube.
bagleface 6
I don't think your straight
arsenicalhumor 30
It could be worse! Well.. No.. Maybe not..