Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized Build-a-Bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear, "We should break up" instead. FML
Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML
Today, my boyfriend told his best friend to text my sister telling her to tell me that he was breaking up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because he thought he heard another guy in the room when he called me, and that I'm cheating on him. The guy he heard was a character from a cartoon my sister was watching. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house, I heard him shout, "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, get back here!" He was talking to his cat who'd run out the door behind me. FML
Today, my boyfriend left me for his sister. No, not my sister. His sister. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, and gave his little speech, over the phone. He did all this while his ass was firmly planted in a chair in the next room. FML
Today, my boyfriend of six years broke up with me over video chat. Two days before I was to move across the country to be with him. All of my things are already shipped. He said he thinks of me as a sister. FML
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Top comments
fermata 0
Wow I'm at a loss for words. It's amazing what stunts losers would pull to get out of having a mature, face-to-face talk with you.
sjx 0
that's just mean :-(
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Comments (167)
robinhoood 0
lulz at #72. Teddies have bad days too. Haha. Awesome. He should have been waiting outside the door so when you walked out he could say "what the bear said." That might have saved him some man points, while still allowing him to pull off the awesome bear thing. Today a strange man took me from my toybox and violated me with a tape recorder. Hours later I was squeezed by a hysteric woman, forcing me to say something like "It's over" then be cuddled and criedo n for another hour and a half. FML
humpty_dumpty_fml 0
hahahahahaha awesome :D
kellster 2
Totally agree with #2! What amazing lengths to go to just in order to avoid actually talking to you like a normal adult. I'm so sorry, and you're clearly better off!
RenRen_fml 0
Aw...that really sucks. He's a coward, you shouldn't let him hurt you that way.
philopastry 0
WHAT A DOUCHE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hug*
OtakuX 0
THAT is just AWESOME!
Melodious 0
I'm sorry. Dx With a bear, though? And your little sister's? Wowza, that goes to show how much of a dick he is.
LilleyWhite 0
why would he go to all that trouble when he could just say it to your face? he's a douche
oliviagrizz 0
thats a cool way to be dumped though
lunchmeat317 0
How did he do that? I didn't know you could record to those things. This opens up a whole realm of possibilities.