Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, a group of Girl Scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought two bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML
Today, I ate a chocolate bar before getting my morning coffee. While waiting for it, a good looking guy started talking to me, then suddenly lost interest. Afterwards, I saw the chocolate on my face in my car mirror. FML
Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML
Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML
Today, I brought a huge chocolate bar to work, left it in the break room, and came back to find it gone. Later, I saw a coworker with chocolate all over his face and fingers. I asked him if he took it, and he said, in almost offended tone, “What? No, that’s mine.” FML
Today, while at my job in a candy store, a boy stuck his hand into the bin, contaminating the candy. As I politely explained that the dad had to purchase the affected candy he refused, yelled, then angrily agreed to buy them. The total cost of the candy with the extra pieces? $1.69. FML
Today, I work at a general store and a customer came in trying to bargain a set price of an item. The item? A 50 cent candy bar. He wanted it for 34 cents. This is not the first time he's done this. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
Today, I threw an event with my colleague that completely flopped. At the end, my colleague invited the few people who showed up to take as much candy as they wanted from the gift bags I paid for and assembled myself. My colleague contributed neither the money, nor the effort to put them together. FML
Today, a door-to-door salesman came to my apartment. I was too lazy to change from my teddy bear print pajamas, fuzzy socks and pink slippers when opening the door to him. He took one look at me and asked, "Hello darling, are your mommy and daddy home?" I'm 22 and live here on my own. FML
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Top comments
that1guyyy 12
Did you say...chocolate? CHOCOLaAATE!!!!
x_KL_x 7
Kick his door in and take his wallet. They teach you that stuff in girl scouts right??
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Comments (123)
gene818 13
How could you NOT have change when you sell stuff from door-to-door?! YDI
lwilso41 5
anyone else really feel like eating chocolate after reading this?
fibsville 3
Dude, if you're selling something, you should bring a basic float of change. YDI for not being prepared.
Jasonf6 0
Call the cops? Theft is theft regardless of the amount.
rubberduckie94 13
at least he did not call you a bell end and throw a newspaper at you
LinaLyssic 12
A salesperson should always have change with them, so that was stupid. I wouldn't say ydi though, since he stole from you...
causticgirl 6
Get change and go back over. Knock on the door and tell him you have change so he can pay you for the chocolates. If he laughs or refuses tell him your going to tell Mr Policeman that not only did he take your chocolates without paying, but he tried to touch your privates. Bet he pays up
BlAzEtHiS 0
That's called theft. You should've called the police and had that asshole arrested.
megamandude455 10
CHOCOLATE!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!!!!!! I want chocolate now owo
stoneywoney 3
Don't you have to be eighteen to have FML....chocolates?
desireev 18
Aaaaand how old are you? You seriously look like you are 12 years old. P.S: nobody does the 'rock on' sign anymore.
iwadasn 33
93, do you think you personally define what's cool and what isn't? You look like you're barely in high school (yes, it's obvious you lied about your age), so you have quite a bit of growing up to do yourself.