Today, I went to the tanning bed. I laid down in the bed and turned it on and the fan started blowing. There was a terrible smell and I thought it was the person before me. Then I realized it was just the fan blowing my sweaty feet towards my face. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed with a pedestal fan on facing us when my boyfriend sneezed. Where did he sneeze? Into the fan, which then sprayed it all over my face. FML
Today, after showering and moisturising, I turned my fan on to max blast. I got covered in clumps of dust, which I had to take another shower to remove. FML
Today, I got a new roommate in the dorms. When I got back to my room, I could smell her feet before I even opened my door. FML
Today, I went to get my spray tan before my semi-formal. After I applied lotion to the bottom of my feet as instructed, I went in the booth and began to start the tanning session. I lost my balance and fell right as the machine began to spray. I look like a spotted cheetah. FML
Today, I got a spray tan for the first time. Naked, I climbed into the booth. When the machine started I became frightened by the loud roar of the spray and couldn't breathe. I pissed myself out of fear. I now have river-like streaks down both legs where the pee washed my tan away. FML
Today, while sitting on the couch with my husband, I farted quietly. Not a big deal, except it's hot out and our fan was blowing in his face, and it stunk. FML
Today, I had to train a new guy whose body odor was killing me. After he'd left, I had to run two industry size fans to blow the stench out of my office. FML
Today, I fell off the top of my bunk bed in my sleep onto a running fan. FML
Today, I used the tanning booth for the first time. Not only was I so white that I received first-degree burns all over my body, but I also forgot to remove my knee-high socks. FML
Today, while at the gym, I noticed a foul smell while on elliptical machine. I figured it was the little old lady on the machine next to me. It was so bad I had to leave. When I got in my truck, I realized the smell had followed me. It was me. My cat had pissed on my workout clothes. FML
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Top comments
YLS 0
Enjoy your melanoma, it'll make sweaty feet the least of your worries.
Eddie_Paints 0
YDI for the fake bake!
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Comments (133)
sugarbabyxoxo 2
actually... it's only burning that harms your skin. I worked in a tanning salon. and we had a pressure tanner and it's impossible to burn in it because the lights only put out rays to tan you. you go in for a half hour once a month. and no one has ever burned. that's what cause skin cancer anyways is burning. I'd rather be nice and tanned than white as a ghost. some people look great woth light porcilin skin butt seriously most people look like freaks! aaaaahahahha
idkweird 0
#72: I actually got burnt in a tanning bed that was supposed to be specially designed NOT to burn you. It was so bad that I couldn't straighten my legs for a couple days. The melanoma I got was on the underside of my boob, which would have only been exposed to "rays" in a tanning bed. Also, what people find attractive depends on their culture. Ive been in nail salons where the women have complimented my pale skin saying they wished theirs could be the same. Ive actually come to love my pale skin, and I think it's beautiful and it suits me. I'd much rather be pale and have nice skin as I age, then to have it leather up and be slightly darker.
sugarbabyxoxo 2
like I said some can pull it off really well. I was refering to loser emo kids who are white as he'll from using ridiculous cover up ahaaha they look gross. I have lots of pail friends who look good with pail skin. I do not. at all.
CallMeHush 1
OP, it doesn't happen often but reading this while I was eating breakfast grossed me me out. You win! Stinky.
CallMeHush 1
Special K
Nolwen_fml 0
fake tan, fake blonde hair.. fake boobs?? Fake girls are in, you can tell by the number of bleached hair and orange faces you see everywhere. It's ok to be pale, direct sun is bad for your skin (and no, black or darker skin doesnt automatically protects you from the UV rays). I see girls my age (23) and they look like leather skinned 40 y/o cougars cause they tan too much.
sabatical 0
that's what you get for wearin uggs all day with no socks on.
ruizes 0
YDI for not washing your feet.
Brittanysway420 0
Gross, wash you feet once and a while! YDI
sugarbabyxoxo 2
I've had crazy light blonde hair my whole life lol. and my **** are just natrually massive lol, oh and I go tanning so that means I'm fake? **** your self for judging people by how "fake" you think they look. I don't judge people I just tell the truth.. if you think your hott shit and your not I'll tell you. if your an emo freak I will make fun of you. lmao. butttt fake girls aren't in I don't even where make up. I just have the blonde hair, huge **** and happen to like tanned skin.
tweetbaby14 18
I agree with 76 and then what makes it worse is because everyone else has fake boobs everyone assumes mine are fake cuz I'm skinny with Ds hanging off the front of me :(. p.s. don't bitch me out if you think I'm talking about you just because you like to make it seem as though everyone loves talking about you.