Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy. I lost interest in him quick, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom, hoping to make a run for the hills. As soon as I reached the front door, our server yells out, "I hope you’re not thinking about dining and dashing!" FML
Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML
Today, I went on a date at a restaurant with a guy. When he promised I wouldn't have to pay the bill, I didn't think he meant we'd be dining and dashing. FML
Today, my friend took me and a bunch of other guys out to a nice dinner. This was his way to say thank you for helping him move to a new apartment. He got the cheque, excused himself to go to the restroom and never came back to pay. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, while at a restaurant, my date shat himself. He spent the entire meal pretending nothing had happened. FML
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Top comments
Big_lama6 7
Perhaps you should have atleast tried calling or texting him before you left?
ghostlilac 25
Aww poor guy! That's so embarassing :(
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Comments (147)
baronsmommy 14
Hey, if you guys end up getting hitched one day it'll be a great story to tell your grand kids. Better than a drunken night in Tijuana...hell maybe I'll just tell your story thanks!
perdix 31
You probably missed out on the best or worst blumpkin of all time, though. I'm not sure what the desired outcome of that maneuver is.
Pandacupcakelove 26
Awww... Well he can't blame you for getting the wrong idea when he had been gone for 15 minutes. It was nobody's fault, just an honest mistake. I'm sure he'll understand if you just explain. :)
FYLDeep 26
Just because he's MIA you can go AWOL? Never leave a man behind!
pdp_fml 21
Did you try and contact him via his cellphone? Sorry that your date night was ruined.
afropuffjake 9
Well at least if he's still interested the next date should be really good too. Nothing wrong with being a realist, there are a lot of douches out there.
MilkMaid75 2
No harm, no foul ( other than his tummy ). I am sure he is more upset about this than you!
meccamputechture 4
Today, I went to dinner with this amazing girl. My stomach started to hurt so I went to use the bathroom. When I came back, she had ditched me. FML
the_true_batman 10
This doesn't seem that bad, unless either he was angry that you left or you are that upset about paying. Since he didn't ditch you nothing bad really happened. You can continue dating and have a funny story to tell people about your (what I assume to be, uh oh, I just made an ass of both of us) first date.
brewmasterg 34
Dude- mega trust issues. After fifteen minutes you just walk away without even attempting to find out what happened? Especially after saying he's awesome, did you really think he would be one to just skip out on you? Talk about catastrophizing. I feel sorry for you, OP.