Love: Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely...

By crapcrapcrap - 14/03/2010 07:00 - United States

Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 139

You deserved it 4 772

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Same thing different taste

By great. - 02/01/2013 18:59

Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 966

You deserved it 3 556

By Lonely Gay - 22/02/2012 09:37 - United States

Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 494

You deserved it 5 388

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 960

You deserved it 3 354

By Anonymous - 12/05/2019 02:00

Today, after weeks of being hounded to go out on a date with this guy, I finally found the time and invited him over, fully intending to hook up. He stood me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 760

You deserved it 465

Crafty

By Anonymous - 07/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 499

You deserved it 3 204

By Anonyme - 06/04/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 306

You deserved it 152

By lamesauce - 15/02/2009 10:32 - Canada

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 836

You deserved it 3 051

By OhDear - 24/02/2011 20:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 833

You deserved it 5 084

By Anonymous - 28/11/2015 05:25 - United States

Today, I went on my first date in six years. The guy was unbelievably creepy, and I couldn't wait for it to be over. Right after we finished eating, he told me he loved me, then tried to lean in for a kiss. He looked like he was going to cry when I turned him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 962

You deserved it 1 966

Joe Smooth

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 04:59 - United States - West Covina

Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 130

Anonnamus 0

Sunday 14 March 2010 12:19

Today, some strange girl sat at my table during lunch break. She wouldn't stop staring at me, and kept asking me about my hopes and dreams. I tried to avoid eye contact and ate my lunch so fast, I had bad gas for the rest of the day. FML

plainDainty 0

Sunday 14 March 2010 12:08

then make sure there isn't a second date. end of story.

Comments

mrzero 0

Monday 15 March 2010 9:10

I guess he find you ugly when he saw you

wimman 0

Monday 15 March 2010 16:37

Why would it be a "first" date if he totally ignored you? Sounds like a last date to me.

VenomByte 1

Monday 15 March 2010 22:27

He what? I wasn't listening!

toaster468 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 3:10

show him ur *******. that oughta get any straight mans attention. lol

CurtisG117 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 5:40

And the worst thing about it is, she doesn't know that she is dead.

DRY0YRD 0

Friday 19 March 2010 1:12

Hahahahaha I cracked up at that ^^

bookbee 2

Wednesday 17 March 2010 2:15

So why do you like him? He's a dink.

FockinA 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 11:10

OP: so , did you put out?

frikkinhannah 0

Monday 22 March 2010 22:58

69 wins this page. I love posts that mention other FMLs. :P

ponageman250 0

Tuesday 6 July 2010 8:13

I apologized for that

tangelo23 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 6:09

Well that's what you get for being embarrasing to the human race.

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Today, while I was showering, someone left a note on the bathroom door that read, "We can all hear you masturbating. Shut the hell up." I don't know what's more embarrassing, that everyone in my house thought I was masturbating or that I was actually singing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 052

You deserved it 372

Today, my husband and I have officially become that couple that has to schedule sex. Between his working, my going back to school, raising kids, doing housework and homework, we just haven’t had time. Last night we tried to be spontaneous and get it on. We both fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 586

You deserved it 245

The Top

Today, I was tanning nude in my backyard, when I took a picture of our dog lying in the grass and sent it to my dad. It was only after I looked at the picture indoors that I realized my nipple had made it into the picture too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 506

You deserved it 37 858

Today, I was at a family reunion, but I've always hated my family. I walked up behind my husband and said, "I can't wait to go home and get it on." My husband turned around. It was my uncle, wearing the same hat as my husband's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 878

You deserved it 40 814

Today, is my one day off for the week. My mother in law is visiting, and has decided we need to rearrange my living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 592

You deserved it 995

Today, I came home to find that my dog had chewed up my brand new, expensive pair of shoes. I was so angry that I yelled at him and he cowered in fear. But then, as I looked at his sad little face, it dawned on me that I was the one in the wrong for getting so upset over something materialistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 928

Today, I finally matched with someone on Tinder after using it for a month. I sent a message and they unmatched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 125

You deserved it 1 225

Today, I called off my engagement with my now ex-girlfriend. Yesterday, while drunk at a get-together with all our friends, she admitted she's still in love with her best friend, and only went out with me to forget about him, but is still pining for him anyway. She doesn't understand why that factoid might upset me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 772

You deserved it 124

Same thing different taste

Crafty

Joe Smooth

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