Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date, meeting up in a park. I got there first and sat down to wait for him. After a while, a guy sat down next to me. I wasn't sure if it was him, so I texted him, asking if he'd arrived. His response was, "I'm already here, sat to the left of the old woman dressed like a gypsy." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up at a coffee shop. I arrived early, feeling nervous but excited. As I sat waiting, I noticed a person waving at me from across the room. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that they were actually waving at someone behind me. My date never showed up. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by my best friend. When I got there, my "date" was my ex. My best friend knew, and she thought it would be "funny" to see how we would react. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by a friend. Everything was going great until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Twice. My date promptly excused herself to the restroom and never came back. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
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Top comments
Alex_DeLarge 0
Even if that wasn't her, did you think insulting somebody would make you look cool?
Callyn 47
You're an ass. Even if she wasn't fat, she probably would have found that offensive. You should've just told her that you were there. If you weren't attracted to her, you aren't obligated to make a second date but you don't have to be rude.
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Comments (237)
icanhazalife 0
this is so stupid! first off, i can't believe you actually wrote that without thinking that it might be her... and second, what made you think that a thin super-model would go on a blind date? If she was gorgeous, then why would she have a problem finding a man? I hope she finds a man who like her for her personality. besides, you probably don't look too good either, seeing that you need your date to be "blind" before she can go out with you. Did you ever stop to think that because that woman was obese, she probably wins on other good qualities; I bet she's really kind and a good cook.
Tim_Otay 0
describing her or anyone as a "fat chick" demonstrates how immature you are.
zack767 0
screw personality I wanna chick I can bang for two year max then find a new one screw marrage and having kids the worlds over populated to many fat people wasting good food
skylovesyourmom 0
Hahaahaahahaah
Kervik 0
#8 and #23, you are awesome! :D
SarlaccBits 0
Maybe next time you will keep your nasty comments to yourself. YDI for making fun of people to other people you don't even know.
indianabummer 0
We don't even know if she was really fat or just overweight. For all we know the OP could be extremely shallow and every girl that has some curves is a cow. Although it was extremely rude to say a fat chick. Could you not say what color shirt she was wearing? I secretly hope she ate you
daniirae 0
what made me laugh: your name is panda.... I know that's awful of me to say. but still... haha...
Nissi 17
YDI. Shallow asshole.
mariposa25 0
If I were a blind date girl on the way and got a text like that, we would not be meeting.
canucksrule88 0
hey some people are skinny, and it feels weird to have a girl thats bigger than them...therefore NOT shallow, just certain things make people uncomfortable, like if a girl sits on my lap and doesnt fit or is too heavy, shes not for me. has nothing to do with being shallow so calm down with your insults
Txlonghorn10vy 0
at least u didn't say... I'm here sitting right nxt to a fat chick. that would of been a bad fml
canucksrule88 0
okay guys calm your hormones and stop objectifying the other posters seriously i hate it when guys propel the stereotype that all guys are horndogs