Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date, meeting up in a park. I got there first and sat down to wait for him. After a while, a guy sat down next to me. I wasn't sure if it was him, so I texted him, asking if he'd arrived. His response was, "I'm already here, sat to the left of the old woman dressed like a gypsy." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up at a coffee shop. I arrived early, feeling nervous but excited. As I sat waiting, I noticed a person waving at me from across the room. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that they were actually waving at someone behind me. My date never showed up. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by my best friend. When I got there, my "date" was my ex. My best friend knew, and she thought it would be "funny" to see how we would react. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by a friend. Everything was going great until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Twice. My date promptly excused herself to the restroom and never came back. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
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Top comments
Alex_DeLarge 0
Even if that wasn't her, did you think insulting somebody would make you look cool?
Callyn 47
You're an ass. Even if she wasn't fat, she probably would have found that offensive. You should've just told her that you were there. If you weren't attracted to her, you aren't obligated to make a second date but you don't have to be rude.
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Comments (237)
oystersmoke 0
Hey for future reference: just say the girl with the purple shirt or with the curly brown hair. I am almost certain you would have scored more brownie points if the blind date would have walked up and saw a fat chick sitting next to you and you had not pointed out a negative feature. Being politely vague, especially on a blind date or any date for that matter works wonders. Referring to someone's appearance by their features, that can't be changed in under an hour, usually gets people in to trouble. Example: that guy with the hook nose or the woman with hairy arms. Ya know Mary the hunchback, with the mustache and the droopy boobs? I know it is human nature to point out the obvious but I can't imagine how that woman must have felt. People that are heavy know they are heavy they are fat not blind; it probably really hurt her feelings just the same.
purple91 8
lulul send pics or at least describe appearances before blind dates next time? But I guess they are BLIND dates.
jc21_fml 1
hahaha so did you run? or did she eat you?
reflectedgary 0
Honestly, i dont know why this is really a FML. If you described the girl you were meeting as fat, you probably have no interest in seeing her again. If this is a FML because you upset someone, than you wouldnt have said it in the first place. The only was this is a FML is if the end read... "then she got mad and sat on me" or something like that. Get over it, now you dont have to worry about how you can blow her off.
xXMILKYCHUNKSXx 0
You're REALLY ******* dumb. Your fault for going on a blind date.
godhelpme92 0
I'd say it's funny cus people that are ft have bad eating habits so it's their own damn fault FYL dude
joemerchant2006 0
Good job Einstein. That's a large hole you dug there to climb out of.
F_edUpExsistence 0
To the OP - This is an FYL because why? you got embarrassed by an insensitive comment that you made? or was it because the blind date that you dreamed of, the HOT GIRL with the playboy looks, was not what you imagined? snap out of your delusion and see yourself for what you really are, a shallow jerkoff. to the rest of the commenters hating on fat people - You do not know whether the fat person is that way because they let themselves go, or if it's a genetic trait which they are just responsible of as a person is with the color of their eyes or hair. and while there ARE some portly people out there who are not too pleasing to the eyes, I have seen beautiful people who are quite large. so dont judge a whole demographic by a few of the bad apples. sides, thats just shallow and an ass move, judging by the cover.
lunadragongirl 0
.....and why dont people call each other anymore? this is the 3rd one ive read in the last 20 minutes where someone got ****** over because they texted instead of just calling someone. especially when its a date. seriously, wtf.
LogansRun22 0
Today, I went on a blind date. I got there first and sat down to wait for him. After a few minutes, a guy sat down next to me, and I wasn't sure if it was him so I texted him asking if he was at the park. His response was, "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." FML