Today, I was watching TV on the couch. My mom then kicked me off so she could lie down. Exhausted, I asked if I could sit at the end. She said no. A minute later she called the dog to come sit with her. As I was sitting on the ground, my mom told me to move because, "the dog can't see the TV." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was sitting in my room watching TV when I heard my mother obnoxiously yelling for the dog. Minutes later she stomped into my room, swatted me over the head, and yelled at me for not answering when she called. She actually got my name mixed up with the dog's. FML
Idyllic
Today, after watching TV, my boyfriend and I had to go walk our dog. I was too lazy to get up from the couch immediately so I teased him by turning off all the (smart) lights using my phone. He got mad and went upstairs to continue watching TV, so now I have to walk the dog alone. FML
He prefers the dog
Today, my boyfriend kicked me out of bed so the dog could get under the covers. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
Today, my mom's dog saw a cat in our yard. I watched as he tried to jump at it, only to smack face-first into the window. He did this twice more before curling up on the floor and whimpering pitifully. When my mom came in and saw him there, and me laughing, she accused me of beating him. FML
Today, my dog and I were sitting on the couch. I went to the bathroom, came back, and saw him walk over the remote, which caused the TV to change to the Hustler channel, just a few moments before my girlfriend walked through the door. FML
Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML
Today, I was laying on a couch with my dog watching TV when I heard my dog fart. I looked at her, she looked at me and started waving her tail, blowing it into my direction. FML
Unstable
Today, my mom was in a really bad mood, so I stayed in my room to avoid her. It didn't take long before she barged in and started bitching about my dog, who'd pissed her off by acting too happy. Yes, she's actually that insane, and I have to deal with it on a daily basis. FML
Awkward…
Today, my mom and I were going to the store. I stayed in the car while she went in. In the car next to me, there was a dog in the driver's seat barking at me. Bored, I barked back at it until I realized there was someone in the passenger's seat watching me. FML
Top comments
BKF 0
LMAO! But seriously, FYL your Mom's a bitch.
NGM_KID 0
Well, what makes you think you're more important than her dog? lol jk!! Your mom is such a bitch!!
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Comments (199)
LostHope 0
Sorry but your mom didn't really do a nice thing. You are her child, and yes, i were her, i would of let you sit on the couch with me and definitely you would of been more important than the dog. But it's ok. Just try to forget it
Kylias 6
How rude. I'd be piiiiissed...
kdb_fml 0
YDI, you were probably in the way on the couch, and most dogs wouldn't take up as much room! And if you were that "exhausted" you should've just gone to your room and stopped being a dramatic baby. Your Mom is probably a good mother and you're being an ungrateful ass for acting like she is a terrible mother in order to make your FML sound worse.
notsocreativeliz 0
LOL my mom's done that to me before
lich_fml 0
hahaha. that's fantastic. :) gotta love moms, right?
tWitt3rBuG 0
#29 I'm totally assuming that the OP probably was sitting infront of the mother & blocked her to spite her, the dog part is just to add more drama to this story. Seriously, you can see this is just a "bitter" story from someone needing pity. Sorry OP! #30 Omg, i feel so enlightened...Not! Uh, Duh! Geez, i know that!
AnotherStranger2 0
BITCH! Kill the dog! No, but really: move out, people are WAAAY too obsessed with their dogs!
lcharlie 0
did your mom finish high school or something? dogs don't watch tv. they don't even have a concept of television.
tWitt3rBuG 0
Omg OP, I'm driving to work and realised you're probably are seeking attention from your mom. I'm like totally Sorry. Dude it aint worth it. I love dogs to bit but if she constantly does this, speak to her. Sorry dude.
amykillswitch 0
my mom would do this. sometimes she takes toilet paper and wipes his ass after he takes a shit. its horrifying.