Miscellaneous: Today, I was using a Kodak Picture Maker in Walmart. I needed... - FML

By indecentcameraexposure - Canada

Today, I was using a Kodak Picture Maker in Walmart. I needed help using the machine so the lady that works there came over and tried to load my pictures. I heard some snickering behind me from the people in line. Turns out the pictures loaded. Even the nude ones I forgot about. FML

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Triage

Zoomed out

Get it on, bang a gong

By SignificantShrinkage

Today, I found out that when you gain too much weight, your penis can get significantly smaller. After noticing that things had been "off" in the bedroom, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. There was significant shrinkage. I guess it's time to start working out. FML

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By problems - Thailand - Phuket

Today, on my holiday in Thailand I was using the ATM to withdraw $500 worth of Baht. While doing this the ATM crashed and decided to restart. After 5 minutes it spat my card out and nothing else. When I returned to the hotel to use the Wifi, the ATM had deducted the money from my account. FML

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By Cuntlette - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

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By thefuckedupbunny

Today, while on the train with my dad, my boyfriend sent me a message. It was a nude, and when I looked, my dad saw. FML

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By darn it. - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Santa Cruz

Today, I was babysitting my friend's 12-year-old son while his dad was having an emergency procedure at the hospital. I walked into the den to see if he wanted to go out to dinner, only to find him watching Pornhub on my iPad. FML

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By Anonymous - 30/6/2020 14:01

Stalker vibes

Today, a woman who has a history of being horrible came into my work. I had to help her, so I was determined to be so nice that she couldn't possibly complain about me, like she has about several co-workers before. Apparently, I was too nice. Now she loves me and wants me to help her every time she comes in. FML

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By mylifesucks - Netherlands

Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML

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By Anonymous - New Zealand - Tauranga

Today, we found out that the beloved "Uncle Jimmy" from my early childhood was really the man my mother was cheating on my dad with. FML

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By LonelyHeart - United States

Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML

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By dump truck hater - United States - Austin

Today, when leaving my apartment, I instantly noticed there was a giant dump truck in our lot, which turned out to be directly behind my car. After making a 20-point escape from my parking space and getting to work late, my roommate texts me "DUDE guess what I got last night". A giant dump truck. FML

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By Anonymous - United States - Santa Monica

She used me

Today, I discovered my friend will be upstaging my birthday by hosting another birthday party shortly afterwards. Not for her of course, but in honor of her favorite actor. FML

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By bad surprise - United States

Today, I went to surprise my boyfriend in the shower. I opened the door and there was a giant shit in the open toilet. I pretended I was looking for my hairbrush. FML

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By brother love - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that the guy I like was only coming to my house to get closer to my brother. FML

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By caliibbyy

Today, I found out my best friend has a massive head lice infestation. It wasn't until after I'd used her hairbrush to brush my hair that I figured it out. FML

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By shouldhavecheckedthelock - United States

Today, after having not used my laptop since January because I thought it was broken, I found out that the key lock has been on the whole time. FML

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By Why Me - United States - Seattle

Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML

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By Solo coffee

Today, it's my last day of work at my job of 2 and a half years. I organised to have coffee with my coworkers at a cafe. Only I turned up. I had my farewell coffee alone. FML

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By FattyMcFatterson - United States

Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML

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By preggers - United States

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML

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By Honey Badger - United States

Today, I was at a meeting. One of the other members decided to share that their cat had passed away recently. I got an uncontrollable nervous laugh, started crying because I was laughing so hard, and left the room while everyone watched in horror. FML

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By heartfelt - Sweden - Uppsala

How you remind me

Today, I was rejected by a company I applied to. When I was writing my application, I spent so much time on their website researching that the ads on my browser are almost all for their products. It's like getting rejected again with every click. FML

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By BookBabe - United States - Panorama City

Today, I wore my new Brazilian thong bikini to the pool for the first time. I was lying face down feeling so sexy, until flies started buzzing my butt. FML

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By Fatty - United States

Today, I was excited about my friend going wedding dress shopping. Before I went to go work out, I decided to try on a prom dress from high school to remember what it felt like to get dressed up. It was too tight, I broke the zipper, and spent 45 minutes trapped before I cut myself out. FML

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By nosonofmine - Iceland - Reykjav

Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML

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By and not even in the good way - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to smack my daughter's head gently with a balloon. It hit her hair clip and exploded. She won't stop crying, and my wife will be home any minute. I'm screwed. FML

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By ouch - United States - Sterling

Today, I spontaneously got my ear pierced. By spontaneously, I mean my 12-year-old sister stabbed one of her earrings into my ear while I was sleeping. She claimed the freckle on my earlobe looks "exactly the same" as the hole from her ear piercing. FML

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By nearlythere - Australia

Today, I was getting ready to perform a speech in anthropology on the globalization of public transportation and how it brings cultures together. On the bus ride there, the girls behind me were discussing ways to hide their track marks after injecting. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, while making love to my boyfriend, my sister called my cell phone. Not wanting to face the consequences of not answering, I had a long conversation with her. My boyfriend kept going. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend didn't come home from a night of drinking with the boys again, so I told him that I was packing my things and I wouldn't be here when he came home. After all my things were packed, I realized he drove my car to the bar. FML

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By CassieMarieee - United States

Today, I had to jump into my car while it was still moving. Apparently, just because you put it in park and turn it off, doesn't mean it won't take off towards a ditch without warning. FML

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By Anonymous - 8/6/2020 05:04

Acceptance

Today, I can't look my roommate in the eye because he walked in on me showing my drag friends my new dress on Discord last night. My roommate is really conservative. We used to get along so well too. FML

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By sweetie808 - United States - Kailua Kona

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

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By InsaneIdiots

Today, after recovering from surgery, I was leaving the clinic when a bucket of red paint was thrown at me, and a woman shouted that I was a murderer. I replied, "Sorry, would you like me to ask the doctor for my ovarian cyst back so I can pretend it was a fetus?" She hit me with her handbag. FML

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML

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By BuspassBob - United States

Today, I found out that the car I got a great deal on a few days ago, needs a new transmission. I'm now the proud owner of a very large and very expensive paperweight. FML

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By Anonymous - Japan

Today, I broke up with the girl I'd been dating for two months because she started smoking. This is a deal breaker for me. I just found out from her friend that she started smoking for the sole purpose of getting me to break it off and now plans to quit. FML

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By ozozl - United States - Evergreen

Today, I was in the middle of a shower, and downstairs I heard my 7 year old daughter screaming "Mom!! Help! I need you right now!" I panicked and ran downstairs, not giving myself enough time to put some clothing on. It was my neighbor at the door. FML

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By chlorinesmells - United States

Today, a kid I taught to swim became my new boss, at the pool that I have worked at for nine years. FML

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Top comments

By Pandasaur | 0

#542200 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:22

Oops. People snickering when they see you naked is never a good sign. FYL.

By Paigeth | 0

#542234 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:28

No offense, but KPK's (Kodak Picture Kiosks, as they're called), are very simple to use. It even speaks to you and tells you what to do.

COMMENTS

By Pandasaur | 0

#542200 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:22

Oops. People snickering when they see you naked is never a good sign. FYL.

Reply

IamSpartacus | 0

#542753 - Sunday 6 September 2009 5:15

First reply!

Reply

Zombierella | 2

#542809 - Sunday 6 September 2009 5:42

FREE PORN

Reply

seanreddog | 4

#542922 - Sunday 6 September 2009 7:23

YDI FOR SELLING YOURSELF AT WALMART. Your "always low prices, always" for a reason, fat bìtch.

Reply

greendaygirl999 | 5

#966286 - Monday 22 March 2010 7:57

YDI for being a slut and taking nudies

Reply

NoahStaz | 3

#2242557 - Saturday 26 March 2011 2:41

It was a dude...

Reply

twilightluver347 | 7

#2270100 - Thursday 31 March 2011 4:26

and that makes it any better?

Reply

Sae_Ghelk | 6

#3194494 - Sunday 28 August 2011 11:21

atleast he doesen't like twilight.

Reply

KatherineAnne | 7

#3260603 - Friday 9 September 2011 5:03

I'd snicker if I saw a guy was taking nudes. Yukkk I don't want to see pictures of dicks lol

By PoeticPixie | 0

#542206 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:23

That's why you check these things beforehand. Be a little smarter next time

By _anonymoose_ | 0

#542211 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:24

YDI

By Paigeth | 0

#542234 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:28

No offense, but KPK's (Kodak Picture Kiosks, as they're called), are very simple to use. It even speaks to you and tells you what to do.

By YourLifeIsntOver | 0

#542238 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:29

I think you deserve to be put on the WHOF! (Walmart Hall of Fame). FYL for sure.

Reply

gummibehrs | 4

#542771 - Sunday 6 September 2009 5:24

Or Hall of Shame, depending on if they were snickering because of the nudes, or because of something about the nudes :o

Reply

gummibehrs | 4

#542777 - Sunday 6 September 2009 5:26

Either way it's funny :D

By null_fml | 11

#542241 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:29

You take enough naked pictures of yourself that you can actually lose track of / forget about them?

By OneandOnlyOne | 0

#542242 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:29

They were laughing, NOT snickering. You must be Really tiny!!

Reply

mattjakon | 6

#3125963 - Wednesday 17 August 2011 15:03

who said it was a guy ?

Reply

KailyKii | 11

#3492197 - Wednesday 26 October 2011 10:45

Well if you look at the post you can clearly see it.

By Chowi_fml | 0

#542244 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:30

Wacky Canadian!

By iljajlm | 4

#542263 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:35

I don't see why pepole randomly take nude pics of themselves. But YDI. Check your damn camera first.

By shootingstar8D | 0

#542296 - Sunday 6 September 2009 1:48

Who cares you won't see them again