Today, I was talking to my girlfriend on Facebook. She's in the forces, and it was her birthday. I asked her if she liked the flowers I sent her. She thanked me, then asked if she could remove our relationship status. When I asked why, she said, "It's not like we're really going out anymore." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend over MSN that we had to talk. I log on to facebook and the first thing I see is that she changed our relationship from "In a Relationship" to "It's Complicated." FML
Today, I rang my girlfriend to make sure she made it home alright. She told me to check my Facebook. Nothing was different so I hit refresh. We were no longer in a relationship. I got dumped via Facebook whilst on the phone to her. FML
Today, I saw the girl I had started dating changed her Facebook relationship status to "In a relationship". Naturally, I changed mine too. The next time I logged on, she had commented, "Really?! Who?!" She was serious. FML
Today, I had a date with a girl I'd been seeing for about a month. When I got home, I saw her Facebook status changed to "In a relationship." This made me kind of excited, until I realized it wasn't with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend's Facebook relationship status was changed to single. When I tried to ask her about, she told me she's a lesbian now. Her mullet should've been a clue. FML
Today, after dating my girlfriend for about a month, she changed her Facebook status to taken. When I saw the update, I immediately clicked "Like." Then I looked up and saw I wasn't the person she had put herself in a relationship with. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, my girlfriend changed her relationship status on Facebook to 'It's Complicated' because I didn't give her my last cookie. This happens all the time. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me via Facebook chat. When I asked her why, she replied, "You know why." and blocked me. No, I don't know. FML
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Top comments
Kukironosuke 16
that just means she's already cheated on you and just wants to justify her actions by insinuating you both knew the relationship was over
Jimboom 12
Ouch. But your probably better off without her in the long run. Get yourself a hottie that actually lives in the same country as you and bang her **** off!!
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Comments (105)
Ninjaface 0
YDI for having a small magazine. She broke up with you because she realized that once she got back she'd have to deal with your blowing your entire clip in two minutes.
Scubadiver172001 0
Lol. She probably just joined the Australian armed forces for the free boob jobs they give. Then she suddenly became "too good" for you and she dumped you like yesterday's news.
kmhello313 0
She's probably busy doing it with all the hot n built military men she's meeting.
lisha88 1
Total fail! that means she got a hot date for her birthday
fatalwish 6
Well being ex mil i can definatly say dont be nice to her sges already banged half her platoon if not more women tend to flip the **** switch when they are around thousands of horny guys and it typicaly happens when both parties are totaly wasted so cut sling load and call it at that drop that baggage and dont look back
Szaszaspasz 26
I have finished almost 23 years in the military. I wasn't free with my favours as was suggested. When there was just myself and a larger number of guys; I was like a sister to them. (No, there wasn't any incest.) No I wasn't banging guys like a screen door in a hurricane!
monk1002 0
just goes to show the cold hearted nature of women, and in my experience women are just that; cold hearted jackals. and the good ones? few and far between.
FutueMeamVitam 24
'Humans'. The word you're looking for is 'humans'.
iLoveFamilyGuy 7
Don't hate if I'm wrong but I think she still loves you but can't see you if she's in the forces. Long distance relationships can be hard :P
BVBARMY1238 9
96- You jerk! What the ****?!?! I am in the forces somewhat and I am a women, whom is greatly offended.
tuckit 28
That's so sad.
tuxedoandex 28
Break up with he- oh wait...