Today, I was stuck in a room with a man who was catching flies. That I could cope with, until he insisted on turning the lights out because it was 'stressing out' his flies. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I put up one of those hanging fly catchers in my room due to the unsettling amount of flies in the house. I remarked how stupid flies were to land on them. Within an hour, I got up and walked straight into it. FML
Today, I walked past my fly strip while a fly who had been caught, but hadn't yet died, was on it. While I was there, I could hear his frantic buzzing and see his little arms flailing like mad as he tried in vain to escape. Great. Now I feel like shit for putting these things up. What kind of a monster am I? FML
Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML
Today, I keep killing flies in my room, probably dozens on a daily basis, and yet every day there seems to be more of them. I have to sleep backwards in my bed so the droning of the fan drowns out the buzzing noise, or else I can't sleep. Even then, I sometimes jump awake when one lands on my ear, which is often. FML
Today, I've become so accustomed to having flies in my house that I just gave up on getting rid of them. I only kill the ones that repeatedly land on my face or, worst of all, in my ears. Especially when they get stuck in my hair. FML
Today, for the third day in a row, I have been volunteered to kill and dispose of the bugs entering my apartment. I live with two "manly" men who can't use a flyswatter. FML
Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML
Today, I was at work and a lady screamed at my manager for about 15 minutes, saying I needed to be fired because I couldn't get rid of all the flies buzzing around her food. She was the one who chose to eat on our patio. FML
Today, I learned that my house's fly infestation is worse than I thought. I now have maggots crawling and dropping from my ceiling. I have to sleep under them. FML
Today, I tried to smack a fly that was buzzing around my room. I ended up hitting the wall a little too hard, scaring my cat, who jumped up and ran under the bed, knocking over a lamp. The fly is fine. FML
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Top comments
xrainbowshadowx 17
And why exactly were you stuck in a room with a guy like that?
your_ma 27
What a proper mental!
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Comments (47)
patrickalamo 48
Lord of the flies
loserman67 36
Sounds like you need to turn out the lights, as you quickly and quietly exit the room......
snazzy_247 0
STOP STRESSING THE FLIES!!!!!!!!!! People these days just don't understand!
narcosoldier 2
Awkward
SayHiToChucky 0
RENFIELD!
jerico616 14
With psychos like that, is it any wonder why I carry a gun??
tsume24 3
that's nothing. my mom thinks closing my door for a couple minutes when there's a fan pointed at it "stresses the fan out." this is the same woman who feeds our FOUR cats THREE times a day, the same woman who thinks our Flemish rabbit understands English...the same woman who thinks she can tell the emotions my fish are feeling. I think I'd rather hang out with the fly guy. (seewhatIdidthere)
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
Cool story bro. Tell it again.
tsume24 3
I will!
lol0wnee 5
Just leave.
Buttsexpirate 9
Be careful! Everyone knows flies unleash their hidden monster forms in the dark. What is he thinking, bringing so much danger to you. Argh!
allthatremains25 0
Flies have feelings too yah know?