Today, I was struggling to move a large bookshelf downstairs. Mid-way down, the weight became too much for me and I desperately yelled to my dad for help. He stood at the top of the stairs and said, "Cash or broken bones. How much's it worth, son?" I'm now £50 poorer. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I helped my parents move out of their old house. While I was guiding my dad down the stairs with the couch, my mom asked me to pick up the tape on the step below me. I bent over and grunted. My dad thought I said "Go" and kept moving. He knocked me down two flights of steps. FML
Today, while moving a couch and repeatedly asking my dad what he was trying to do and him ignoring me, I got my hand slammed between the corner of the couch and a doorway, because my dad shoved the couch without saying anything. I was holding the corner to stop it from falling on me. FML
Today, my dad and I had an argument. Then we went outside to shovel the snow out of the driveway. I heard him yelling and figured he was just yelling at me some more, so I turned my iPod up so I couldn't hear him anymore. Turns out he had fallen, cracked a rib, and needed help up. FML
Today, my dad decided to get his friend to help move our old sofa to save money. Its leg got stuck in the doorway, scratched the entire hallway wall, punched a big hole in it, and the other leg made a big dent in our front door. We live in an apartment complex and now have to to pay for everything to be fixed. FML
Today, I tripped over a ice block frozen to the ground and hit my knee hard on another. I had trouble getting up, so I asked my dad if he could give me a hand. He started clapping and walked away. FML
Today, after going to the bathroom I went to bed. I have a very sturdy bookshelf that sticks halfway to the right of the door as I enter my bedroom. I had dumbly turned off the lights as I didn't want to bother with them before bed. I ended up kneeing the bookshelf, hard, now I'm wide awake and in pain. FML
Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML
Today, I seized at the bottom of the stairs and broke a rib. I don't have enough money to pay the bill. I don't know what to do. FML
Today, at my job as a librarian at an old library, I was shelving books. Things were great until one entire bookshelf fell over. The damage wasn't too bad. Then the rest fell down. FML
Today, I caught my dad stealing my money again, after I'd warned him he was on his last chance. I threw him out, since he’s been sleeping rough on my sofa. He reported me to the authorities for "elder abuse" and showed them fresh bruises I know the conniving old bastard gave himself. I was handcuffed. FML
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Top comments
broderickc 13
Dick move dad, dick move
emirie 21
Father of the year award.
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Comments (51)
TXfmylifer 10
Here's what you can say in 20 years: "Cash, nursing home, or die alone motherf#cuker!". That'll teach him.
Baybiiie 11
Now THAT is a hustler!!!
othehugemanatee 8
Contracts made under duress are not legally binding. Don't pay up!
jmeshvrd 13
You should've let it go... LET IT GOOOO... Can't hold it back any more!
Tylamin 6
That sucks but is kind of ******* awesome ?
Ninjerman 7
your dad is a dick
bullshitspanish 15
Steal it back
potatomemequeen 14
It sucks to lose 71 USD (for the Americans) Hope he gives it back!
Tyrax 16
I think I'd have told him to screw off, personally. Then the rage would have helped me power through.
notjordansime 12
Do you guys have free health care in the UK? We do I Canada, I'm just wondering if it's the same there...