Today, I was spinning some yarn around to make my new cat run in circles. After about 10 seconds, he stopped going in circles and went straight ahead, happily running several feet into the wall and knocking himself out. My bowel movements have more brain-power than this thing. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my kitten decided that having diarrhea was not a good enough reason to stop running in circles around my living room. FML
Today, my cat had a long dingleberry hanging off his butt. He decided the best way to get rid of it was to freak out and run around the house, shaking shit everywhere. To make it worse, he then licked his still shit covered butt, made a face and promptly threw up. Guess my cat isn’t the brightest. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, I got an exercise wheel for my cat. He took a nap on it. FML
Today, I watched as my poor old cat dragged his ass across our living room carpet, leaving an equally long shit stain on our pristine carpet. My pleas for him to stop only made his diarrhea worse as he ran off. FML
Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML
Today, I got into bed as my cat crept under it. I then heard him gagging, so I instantly got back up to get him out, because my floor is carpeted. As I pulled him into the hall, he flew upwards, made a horrific "Blagh!" sound, projectile vomited everywhere, then hit the wall and ran. FML
Today, I bought my cat a catnip-filled toy that's shaped like a fish. He pounced on it, wrestled with it, and then got so scared of it for no reason that he dashed full speed into the wall. FML
Today, my cat woke me up by vomiting a big, warm, stinky hairball on my neck and then left. I think she was smiling as she trotted away. FML
Today, I bought my cat a nice big bag of expensive anti-hairball catfood, so she'd stop puking hairballs on my things. After eating it, she started running around wildly, howling and projectile vomiting on EVERYTHING. FML
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Top comments
cdgrayson 21
Me-ow
koolkanga 12
Well, much like your bowels, maybe he had a brain fart.
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Comments (109)
tehdarkness 21
Aww, stupid cats are cute.
thecouchisalive 20
Who likes cats anyway?
Gabilliam 19
You made him dizzy, you complete ******* walnut. F the cat's life for having such an uneducated goose penis for an owner.
beanthemouse 13
Ok guys, enough with the threats, pointless comparisons and acting like a complete PETA nutcase. Yes, this guy is an idiot. He does not desereve a cat, and by the sounds of him, he purchased a cat without researching first. Cats should not be given yarn, like someone said, it can choke them due to their tounge. But that does not mean he should get nasty threats, some guy here even said he was a serial killer in the making. All I can say is: W-T-F? OP: You made it dizzy. It will get dizzy. Fun fact: you can't see where you are going when you are dizzy. Considering how you have little knowledge and understanding of cats you should get an animal that is easy to take care of. In fact, maybe no animal at all. They are living creatures, not fashion trends you buy to look cool. They cost a lot of money and time.
WinterBlue42 22
You might be one of the smartest people I have seen on here in a while. The OP, on the other hand, is not. Poor kitty was probably dizzy off his ass. xD
romex918 3
Let me spin you around in circles and tell you to run and we'll see how it goes. It's a cat that was excited and playing.
kasmol 16
And if you keep treating your cat like this, your bowel movements will have more affection for you than will your cat.
happyrhodes 6
The cat was probably dizzy from the spinning. That doesn't make it stupid.
adoseofmicki 12
Well, that's cat.
Exaspera 55
Poor kitty!
lollypop624 11
You shoulda called your cat Matsuda!!