Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML
Today, I fell asleep while on the toilet at work. When I woke up, I tried to quietly sneak back to my desk, only to be caught by my boss. He immediately sent me packing and gave his "best wishes" for me in the unemployment line. FML
Today, I fell asleep while taking a dump. At work. FML
Today, I got home from working 14 hours straight, went to take a dump, and fell asleep on the toilet. I woke up later on the floor, covered in shit and piss, with my alarm going off, an hour before I was due back at work. FML
Today, I fell asleep at my desk. It's bad enough that it was for 45 minutes and that I was snoring. What makes it worse? My boss woke me up. FML
Today, at work, I fell asleep. This is how I discovered that when I'm sleeping, and am scared awake by my boss with an air horn, I yelp louder than a terrier and piss my pants. FML
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, after sitting for hours at my desk, my legs fell asleep. When I got up to go to the bathroom on my break, I couldn't walk properly and leaned against things so I wouldn't fall over. My supervisor then came over and started lecturing me about being drunk at work. FML
Today, I took a dump at work. When I went to flush the toilet, it clogged and began to overflow. I left the bathroom as it was and as I walked out, my boss came in. FML
Today, I was tired from an all-nighter I'd pulled because I thought I had the next four days off work. I got called in, and went because I have bills to pay. However, the amount of energy drinks I drank to stay on top of my job duties gave me such bad diarrhea, I had to go home. FML
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Top comments
old09 11
Been there
NotMuchLuck 0
I hate when that happens...
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Comments (65)
Wheredidgrungego 12
I've heard of sleep walking, but sleep ********? That's just preposterous!
tweetypie 18
Or pooposterous
Buttsexpirate 9
Looking like a freak fallin asleep on the seat. Just make sure you wipe op, don't want to walk into your bosses office with swampbutt in the back
instnt1nfction 17
~sexy~
tingway 4
well what did you say?
Jesus_Christ69 0
Just say you fell asleep takin a poop. Problem solved :)
KiddNYC1O 22
Help her out, Jesus Christ.
aFreedom127 9
Uhhhhhh...because you fell asleep on the toilet (who could make that up?)
littlericht 3
Honk!
MrSaxMan 0
Say you were "droppin the kids off in the pool." it still means your taking a crap
DocBastard 40
"You're working me so hard, I feel I have to catch up on on sleep wherever and whenever I can."
leadman1989 16
Tell him nature was calling... but put you on hold.
RuCheezBurger 10
You know how it is, waiting for that long, nice, refreshing morning dump.
Skater5679 4
Shit happens! And I also hate when that happens.