Today, I was hanging out with a group of friends when I got into a conversation with this really attractive girl who I've liked for months. She asked me what school I go to. I sit to her left in biology. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was talking to a guy at the bar and I told him I was a biology major. He promptly said, "NEXT" and moved on to the girl next to me. FML
Today, I asked out one of the girls that hangs out in my group of friends (the same group I have been hanging out for three years). She stared at me for a couple of seconds, then said, "Who the hell are you?" FML
Today, I went out to lunch with two old friends from high school. While at the restaurant, we saw a girl who we graduated with. The girl gave both of them hugs, then introduced herself to me. FML
Today, I asked a very attractive girl out, then later I ended up talking with her. One of my friends comes up to us and points out that I'm beet red and, "blushing like a bitch". She notices and laughs. FML
Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML
Today, I saw the girl I've been crushing hard on. I go up to talk to her, and I'm immediately greeted by, "I like girls." FML
Today, I started playing footsie with the girl I like next to me in Biology. Turns out it was the table leg. FML
Today, I sat to the right of a girl I really like. I passed her a note asking her to homecoming. She read it, then hurriedly passed it to a hideous girl sitting on her left, who said yes, then hugged me. FML
Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML
Today, I went to a school football game alone. I sat next to these hot girls. To seem cool, I picked up my phone and had a fake conversation with the coolest guy in the grade. Halfway through, he came over and talked to the girls. FML
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Top comments
AmpulexCompressa 0
Uh oh, the girl you want to get with doesn't know you exist. Your life clearly sucks.
hk_fml 9
O_o well then tell her you sit to the left of her in biology! Maybe she'll feel a bit bad about it and you'll be able to use that to get her to go out with you?
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Comments (105)
bexox 0
Yeah, he's just regurgitating stuff from "The Pick Up Artist" anyway.
bexox 0
I agree with Lymm. I HATE arrogant, cocky guys. That is the biggest turn-off to me. pimpin, you should talk to women outside of trying to pick them up sometime. I only go for nice, sensitive guys, never those "player" types.
Jonathan33 0
don't be so down on ur self. at least she knows who u are now! yaaay. now go home and ********** to her as usual.
CherishFlowers 0
Personally, I think you all are taking this post too seriously.
roxy_rescue 0
At least you have the courage to talk to her :)
Unregistered 0
**** off femenists christ is there no end to your ******* bitching its fml not the ******* femenist club for lezbines and neglected woman
Capacop 0
Wow.Honestly,Either your really quiet or she doesn't like you for not having balls because you can't talk.Just grow some and GET IN THERE[:
DameGreyWulf 1
89, you take flowers too seriously.
bexox 0
Pimpin88 - 1. I guarantee I could see through your bullshit if I were to meet you. I guarantee it. I almost wish I could just so I could mess with your Ed Hardy-clad little head. 2. Seeing that I am a female and all, I think I can say that women have a sex drive too. Don't be so proud that you actually managed to have sex. Lots of women want to have one night stands or put out quickly either because they have self-esteem issues or because they're just really horny and you're just attractive enough to not make them puke at the thought of it.
Yasa_fml 0
AAAAAHAHAHAH, whatever inflates your ego, man...