Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, half of my office urged me to file a complaint against a coworker for aggressive behaviour, so I did. Less than 24 hours later, HR gave him a real dressing down and the whole office turned against me for ratting on him to management. FML
Today, I got fired from work. Why? I finally took a stand for myself and confronted my coworker of writing things up in my name for herself, and it getting deducted from my check. So she went to the manager and accused me of sexual harassment. FML
Today, I was fired from my job for sexual harassment. I was shopping after work, and I had to get my female manager to give me a package of extra-large condoms from the lockbox. I could not convince her that I was not flirting, and she took it to HR. FML
Today, I got written up at work over false accusations that I didn't do some safety tasks. The same tasks that were done before I had even arrived. FML
Today, I found out that my coworker shared a laugh with the boss about setting the office desk on fire (which he actually did), while ten minutes later I was threatened with being fired because I made paper snowflakes and hung a few of them next to the computer. FML
Today, I went to deliver some reports to my boss in his office. He was facing away from me and ranting about his "useless employees", so I slipped in and waited for him to put the phone down. Turns out he was talking to himself. When he noticed me, he bitched me out and threatened to fire me. FML
Today, my co-worker threw a rubber mallet at my face, and I broke my finger in the process of saving my face. She then told me to "take it up with HR, bitch". She's the HR manager. FML
Today, I had to give a sexual harassment seminar to my department. Someone put in a complaint that my example made them feel uncomfortable. FML
Today, I went in to work and was handed a write-up for having lied about being sick in order to leave early yesterday. Apparently, a co-worker saw me leave the parking lot, then immediately pull into the shopping center next door. I was going to Walgreens for cold medicine. FML
Today, I gave a big presentation at work, hoping to impress my boss and angle for a promotion. I was already nervous, but a co-worker at the back kept making goofy faces, causing me to repeatedly break into laughter. My boss accused me of being high, and suspended me on the spot. FML
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Top comments
B5B0N35 18
What a dick
Welshite 40
The bend and SNAP! It's a totally legitimate method. I've used it myself.
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Comments (74)
stitesy29 18
When you pick things up off the ground use your knees so this wont happen
martin8337 36
Sounds like a real **** to me.
metalhedcop 6
Hope u have witnesses because I'd fight it
worldclassrager 41
Hope someone else saw to support your case...
cblock94 7
That's why you always bend with your knees.
bobslawnservice 16
Your butt must be phenomenal to get that sort of response.
LithFlavored 10
I'm sure if you explained your case they'd see what an idiot he is
RandomRaybay 13
That shows that he's more interested in getting you into trouble than his actual work. People like that don't deserve jobs!
Obey_StudBoii 23
See if your place of work has cameras. Let them roll the cameras and have them look at it! If they refuse, then hire an attorney and have them get a copy of it. Get the names of the onlookers if there were any and TESTIFY HIS ASS IN COURT!! You have a great case on your hands.
processengineer 9
maybe you make it "hard" for him to work