Today, I was bragging about how I had lost 10 pounds. Grinning, I pulled my shirt up and tried to show how big my jeans were on me. Instead, the button flew off my pants. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my pants felt a little looser than usual. Thinking I'd lost weight, I proudly went about my day. It wasn't until much later that I realised I hadn't lost any weight at all; my fly was down. FML
Today, I leaned over to pick something up and heard a loud "pop" from my waistline, followed by a "clink" on the other side of the room. My pants button had popped off my pants. Time to lose some weight. FML
Today, I was thinking about my new diet and workout plan as I was getting dressed in the morning, feeling much thinner and more energetic. Just as the thought passed through my brain, the button on my skirt popped off. FML
Today, I was trying on some new pants in the fitting room at a store. I was so overcome with joy when I noticed that I had dropped two pant sizes, that when I took them off and went outside to pay for them, I realized I forgot to put back on my original jeans. FML
Today, I found out my trousers have actually been slowing ripping on the side, after I'd been boasting to everyone I have lost weight and that, “My trousers are literally falling off me.” FML
Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML
Today, I was at a job interview. I was doing OK until I reached the part where I had to do a demo. As I lifted my arms, I my shirt got caught on the button of my pants, exposing my belly button. I tried to discreetly adjust, I ended up getting way too distracted mid-demonstration. The interviewer looked at me like I was a circus act. FML
Today, I was lifting weights at the gym and felt proud of myself for pushing through a tough set. Then, I looked down and noticed my shorts had ripped right along the seam. Based on their disgusted faces, everyone behind me got an unwelcome show. FML
Today, I was trying on clothes in a store that had just screens set up for changing. As I took off the first pair of pants had I tried on, my foot got hooked in the cuff and I fell out in my underwear in front of the whole store. FML
Today, I put on a new pair of jeans and went out. Halfway through my errands, I realized the long sticker with my size was still on the back. I walked around for quite a while advertising my embarrassing waist and leg measurements. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
kiran_fml 5
Maybe you should lay off the skinny jeans
TheDrifter 24
10 lbs lighter and your pants are still too small? I shudder at the mental image of the muffin top you used to sport.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (139)
ICATiger 13
Fat bottom girls you make the rocking world go round!!!!
ladyLALAA 29
Bug booty bitches! Now, to work on getting a booty. :(
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Don't worry, I once bent down at a party and ripped my jeans right on the ass. It doesn't mean you're chubby, just own some cheap jeans.
imabeastmofukka 5
Is that what you ladies tell each other?
CallMeMcFeelii 14
Yo bro, that's not cool.
challan 19
I read about someone near me in PA, that bent over at a party, and let one rip so foul that it blew out the ass of his pants. The fire dept had to be called, because people were suffering from gas asphyxiation. Some poor guy named Brandon.
NoOneCaresReally 8
Who the hell were you trying to show? A muffin top like that should not be flashed about... FGS, if you got too much of it DON'T flaunt it.
bekah1993 5
You know what? Being overweight is a hard thing to deal with. Losing ten pounds is a victory! And just because someone weighs a little more than what you think is sexy, doesn't mean they shouldn't wear what makes them happy. And if I want to wear a tight shirt or some skinny jeans, I'm damn well going to do that despite what other people think.
NoOneCaresReally 8
Being overweight is a hard thing to deal with? Not really. If you've let yourself get there in the first place that's your own fault. Losing a family member is hard to deal with. Not knowing whats going to happen to the rest of your life is hard to deal with. Serious stuff, not just being fat. Get your priorities right. Eat healthily, exercise a bit more. Problem solved.
DocBastard 40
NoOneCares - It isn't that simple and you damn well know it. And if you don't, go read up on the causes of obesity before you make even more of a jackass of yourself. If it were really that simple, obesity wouldn't be the huge problem that it is, now would it? Being obese IS serious, as it directly leads to hypertension, diabetes, coronary artery disease, high cholesterol, arthritis, sleep apnea... Want me to go on, or does that sound serious enough for you? Idiot.
bekah1993 5
Exactly! Thank you DocBastard!
NoOneCaresReally 8
Oh yes, so go on, what are the causes of obesity if it's not overeating? I suppose you're one of these people that believes obesity can be a genetic problem, or a disease that can't be helped. And you're calling me an idiot.
MissHayleyJames 7
Why is it that someone can be genetically skinny and eat whatever they want without gaining an ounce, but it doesn't work the other way? Where's the logic in that? Genetics don't make you 500 lbs but they can damn well make sure you'll never be below a size 10.
MerrikBarbarian 9
You do realize Doc is an actual doctor right? As for conditions... Hmmm cushings syndrome, pcos, ovarian cancer, anti-psychotic medication... All are known to cause moderate to severe weight gain- often regardless of the persons attempts to maintain or loose weight. Eating a 1000 calorie a day diet and walking several miles a day- I still gained 15lbs in a couple months of taking an anti-psychotic. Imagine what happens to people on it for years or who are less insanely vigorous about controlling weight gain. I was only on it for a couple months to help with symptoms from a concussion... But many people are on it for life.
klovemachine 24
115 is a failure in life. The end :-D
DocBastard 40
Sounds to me like you actually GAINED 10 pounds. I think your scale secretly hates you and is lying to you.
Pelreskovich 11
OP has their scale sitting on a piece of carpet inside a vacuum.
Pelreskovich 11
Well isn't that just slightly embarrassing!
SkoomaKi 28
Your scales are lying to you!!! But I suppose it's good you "lost" ten pounds.
jerseyboy732 16
elastic pants, my friend, elastic
Pelreskovich 11
Pajama jeans!?
KiddNYC1O 22
Lmao ^.
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
Yoga pants?
iwatchutube 0
YDI for bragging
perdix 31
Losing ten pounds is great, but when you've got 50+ more to go, you need to CTFD on the bragging.
ifknh8usernames 7
Calm The **** Down??
xStaciexLynnx 15
You're one of those people who loses 2 pounds and goes down 4 pant sizes cause they think they're now tiny, aren't you?
imabeastmofukka 5
Damn. I hate big ass females who wear a size 3 thinkin they look hella good. I hate big girls who ruin yoga pants. :/
MissHayleyJames 7
Big girls can definitely wear yoga pants and look fine. They just have to find the right style. I have some that hug me in all the right places and my husband doesn't like when I wear them in public because he's worried about all the guys that will be staring at my ass.