Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home from work. I was really tired and told my son that I would make him dinner later. He called the cops saying, "Mommy won't feed me." FML
Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML
Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on the job. After his mom finally got home 4 hours later, he called her a slut. When he got in trouble for it, he claimed that I taught him the word. Needless to say, I didn't get paid. FML
Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML
Today, I felt sick to my stomach, so I told my mother I didn't want to eat dinner. She started accusing me of being anorexic, so I ate a little bit anyway to make her stop. I then threw up, only for her to take it as confirmation that I have an eating disorder. FML
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Top comments
LemonadePink 0
Okay okay you're fat, not an FML, because that can always be changed you know? At least he didn't say you are ugly, that's something you can't change. SO you are fat and NOT ugly, be happy and lose weight. The end.
xxorganizedmess 0
WHO CARES?
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Comments (93)
KateeJo 0
Isn't he precious? [:
noshitsherlock 0
What a little shit. You should bitch out the mom for raising such an unruly monster.
sillyzombiekid 0
how did you punish him? so,maybe to him,it could've been mean?
scateice 0
The OP didn't say how she punished him. For all we know, she could've nearly suffocated the kid by sitting on him...... or she did the Michael JAckson o:
perdix 31
We're supposed to be jolly, not nice. And we get really pissed off when we see food get thrown or otherwise wasted.
Cristaderzi 0
Lol Kids Lol
Skull_300 0
I hooked up with a fat chick. Turns out that with all that working out she did with her mouth in the kitchen, it paid off when she gave oral!!! Yeeeaaaaahhhh!
soccer_gal6 0
OMG - You guys suck. The point of this fml is that she is in charge of a little shit who insulted her. I babysat kids who would call the parents saying I hit them just because the didn't want to go to bed...some kids are terrible and that is NOT the fault of the sitter. You go girl - being fat does not mean you are a bad person. And, I am not fat, just an FYI.
MuffinJizz 0
Should of pure eaten the little cow. : D
Armin_fml 0
omg, the fat people migrated! D: now they have complete control of the USA they started migrating to Europe oj ofc, I'm happy a fellow Belgian has an FML to post :D
Person1233 13
I dont understand how everyone can say the USA is so fat.. I barely see any fat people where I live except for the convenient store porkers. Maybe NJ is just a skinnier state.
spiderman0606 0
Have you ever been to Texas? West Virginia? Mississippi? Alabama? Los Angeles? South Carolina? Indiana? Tennessee? Alaska? Then you will understand...
The_Uncouth 0
your right, those are mainly the fat states, they should break off and form a new country... they could call it.... Lardonia! lol not many fatties in chicago tho
the_stereotype 0
yeah, not to stereotype, but i was driving along the east coast. when we went north, the people started getting skinnier and the portions started getting smaller. when we drove south, the people started getting larger and the portions nearly doubled in size. i mean, that's why you never see a cracker barrel in new jersey or new york.
Armin_fml 0
seems like nobody noticed the 'oj' in my statement O_o oh well :)
halleyroosan 8
#45 If South Carolina turns into Lardonia, will someone please come help remove me? Nobody here turns fat until about 30. The high school girls look anorexic!