By Anonymous - 11/06/2014 22:46 - United States - Russell Springs

Today, I was babysitting a little girl. I let her play with a box of old Star Wars toys to keep her occupied while I quickly went to use the bathroom, and when I returned she was making the 15 or so figures have a massive orgy, sex sounds included. FML
I agree, your life sucks 48 519
You deserved it 5 741

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Nick_Corso 17

I don't know how you could respond to that


Nick_Corso 17

I don't know how you could respond to that

"No no no, you're doing it all wrong. Han goes in FRONT of Leia, and Chewbacca goes BEHIND." Silly girl.

Op: you are not quick at using bathroom if in that time 15 toys start having sex!! Can be storyline for new Toy story ..

\ 28

Sex noises? One can only imagine. "Yeah baby, hit me with that skin lightsaber!"

Demig0d6 14

Kids shouldn't know these kinds of things, it is best that you tell her parents because this girl might get in huge trouble at school one day...

Oh god, time for her parents to give her "the talk"...

Idk sounds like there has been too much talk going on.

Seems as though she is well beyond the talk

it almost sounds like she's somehow gotten ahold of papa's dvds.

#51, though*. If you're going to write a comment, at least make it grammatically correct.

#52-- *If you're going to comment at least make it grammatically correct.*

I think It's time for her parents to get the talk from her.

55, "Comment" can be used as a noun or a verb. Everybody, move along.

Sorry #52 I did not know this was an English class. I thought it was a place where we post our opinions on a funny FML story. You taught me my lesson now.

CelticSkye 13

No, I think we are way beyond having "the talk" with the kid. I think we're at tge point that the kids parents need to start having their sex parties elsewhere. But then, I'm personally scared that this child nay 've acting out possible abuse. I've seen it before. OP, you should have a serious discussion with the kids to try and find out how this kid learned this "game" and if it were me, I'd report then if I wasn't 100% convinced that this child accidentally saw something they shouldn't have.

I wasn't abused as a child, sexually or otherwise, but I had my barbies and kens do all kinds of crazy stuff like that. I think this is perfectly normal. Kids start thinking about that stuff because it's a natural instinct that we all have, and they haven't learned to repress it like we have, yet.

Wonder if it took place in the Millennium ******

.....we should all write this movie.

We really should. Opening scene could go something like this: The camera slowly pans around the room to find Princess Leia in her slave bikini. She looks up slowly and adjusts her hair buns seductively. "Are you a moisture farmer?" she says seductively to the camera, ".....because you're making me wet." *slowed down Cantina music starts playing in the background*

You guys left out Obi ConDomoni and Jar-Jar Kinky!

I have never laughed so hard at a chain of comments before. Thank you all.

Yes, from Episode IV: A New Float (The Introduction of Water Bras) An especially difficult item to procure on a moisture poor planet. So Luke was the bomb having both a motorbike and landspeeder.

sexyboi1985 27

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
Redoxx_fml 22

How old is she? And what do her parents do in that house?

Honestly I think it's the influence of movies and general television too, it's increasingly become more sexualised and children have access to adult material through the click of a button.

askullnamedbilly 33

It's pretty normal for kids to play sex and romance games, actually. Once they learn what sex is and how important it is to humans, they get curious and try to understand what's going on by roleplaying. I never walked in on my parents or watched movies with sex scenes when I was small, but I still played with my friends or let my stuffed toys act out some pretty strange scenarios.

don't quickly blame the parents.. my cousin used to teach me things when she was 12 and I was 7 and clueless lmao

RedPillSucks 31

@29, but a 15 piece sex orgy? With Dolby surround sound?

Wizardo 33

For the love of the Cantina song, I hope she didn't include Jar Jar Binks and Jabba the Hutt.

WinterBlue42 22

That was a mental image that I REALLY could have lived without. . Worse, now all I can hear is Jar Jar dialog in a sexual context. FML?

The cantina song or Voltaire's song Cantina? "I lost more than my heart in that Cantina...."

Wizardo 33

#19, Oh mesa don't know, we thinks wesa was talking about Star Wars so what does yousa think?

Yes, which is what Voltaire's song is about. An orgy in the cantina. Including the line "and they each took turns Stormtroopin' me in the pooper." It's really quite... Interesting.

Umm by little, how little do you mean? No matter what it's inappropriate, but I feel like there's a big difference between like 3 year old and a 9 year old

Little by comparison to the grown men that might share the same enjoyment of her favorite Star Wars toy game.

Guess she found another use for Luke's light saber

This comment made me laugh alot longer than it should have.

Depending on how old she is, it's not that bad. In my childhood there were girls using their barbies for a massive orgy and these girls turned out fine.

Well as a nursery worker/teacher, if that happened in a nursery/school you would be noting it down as a possible sign of abuse and then going through all the things in the safeguarding policy. Children act out what they see and it's abuse to expose them to that kind of thing, even if it is just accidentally catching some of daddy's special films...

A sign of abuse? Are you insinuating that any kid who has acted out sex scenes with toys was forced to watch someone have sex? All they had to do was watch any kind of movie (The Notebook, X-men, etc) or look at a magazine (Cosmo, or lots of ads in any) and they've seen the position required. I doubt they know what goes where and what happens after. Abuse seems far fetched in most cases.

lb0812 18

22, I think generally it comes more from a place of innocent curiosity. I did some perverted and seemingly premature things as a small child, but I didn't realize the nature of my actions until much later in life. And I typically did these things on playdates or playgrounds, which probably makes the odds of all of my friends being abused pretty slim compared to the odds of us all being curious. I compared my privates with little boys once we realized we had different stuff. My barbies had horizontal, naked make-out sessions, which would then produce a baby barbie. This was simply filling in the blanks from observing boys kiss girls in Disney movies and my parents who slept in the same bed. I'd also drew naked people, simply observing the human body as innocently as I did flowers and animals. I've heard of little boys masturbating, not because little Susie turns them on, but because they've found something that feels good. It's ok to discipline children who may be doing some suggestive things so they can learn that it's inappropriate, but attributing it to abuse is a bit excessive.

skittyskatbrat 19

#22 Teacher here, and if I'd seen that I'd be required by law to report it. Yes, it MIGHT be innocent and hopefully it is. But it's also a glaring warning sign, neon with huge sparkling lights, that something Might Not Be Right. I wouldn't risk it; she is much more likely to be a victim of sexual abuse than a kid whose barbies are "going to the beach" or other non-sexual activities. You can't ignore signals like that. If she's not being abused, a short visit by CPS will show it. If she IS being abused, something needs to be done and fast. Like I said, as a teacher...we don't just teach. We are taught the signs of sexual and physical abuse, what to watch out for, and who to report that to. And we are legally required to do so! This matches exactly with warning signs of possible sexual abuse.

22 and 49 are both correct. In the US teachers are mandatory reporters (babysitters are not). Any aggressive or unusual sex play, especially in young children, is something we've been trained to watch out for. I might not immediately jump to contacting DCFS because of this incident, but I would certainly be watching that child closely. In all likelihood DCFS wouldn't do much just based on this, but there would be a paper trail. An unreported incident could cost a teacher his or her job and reputation, not to mention harming a child.

I've reported many cases of suspected abuse and more than I care to admit turned out to be actual cases of abuse that I was hesitant to report.

36, Statistically, 1 in 4 children are abused in some sort of way whether it's verbally, sexually, physically, emotionally, etc. That's a bit important to keep in mind.

"Daddy's Special Films"??? Last I knew, Adult Entertainment was made for both "Mommy" & "Daddy". Having worked in the adult industry as a cameraperson; please give me a non-biased spreadsheet which shows me that pornography is directed SPECIFICALLY for men and not SPECIFICALLY towards women. If you ask me; it's one big group that should be labelled "Gonzo". Please understand that this is not a direct attack towards you. I think it's just that men admit more to going to stores and shops; while women tend to be more discreet. And please forgive me for being awake over 48 hours and taking on a somewhat sensitive subject.

cleopad1 3

You're missing the point. It's not about sexism, go back and read please.

104, you missed the point. You seem to be rather... Passionate for your ****