Health, Sleep, Wake up and Scary: Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock,...

By Chris - 03/04/2011 17:41 - United States

Today, I was awoken by my dad yelling into my ear. In shock, I jumped up off the couch, and came smashing down into the coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 646

You deserved it 4 120

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Same thing different taste

Occam's razor

By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 803

You deserved it 4 714

By inalotofpain - 16/04/2011 12:46 - United States

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 468

You deserved it 3 906

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 128

Thanks guys

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 00:05 - Canada

Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 122

You deserved it 3 238

By Anonymous - 29/08/2015 17:08 - Canada - Gatineau

Today, I blacked out while hugging my dad. I woke up a minute later on the floor with my dad telling me to, "quit being lazy and get up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 250

You deserved it 1 556

Skittish

By Anonymous - 18/07/2023 22:00 - Netherlands - Hardenberg

Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 584

You deserved it 164

By Karl - 21/02/2011 11:43

Today, I woke up and heard a noise coming from the kitchen. I went down stairs and saw a huge guy in there. I got a vase and hit him over the head, not realizing it was my mom's new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 744

You deserved it 5 967

Shocking

By Anonymous - 02/08/2020 17:01

Today, I tried to hang up a light and, in my clumsiness, got shocked. My dad started screaming at me for yelling out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 255

You deserved it 222

Noise Annoys

By Anonymous - 22/08/2019 06:04

Today, at three in the morning, I rolled out of bed in my sleep, landing butt-first into my trash can and scraping my arm on my bedside table. I cleaned up the mess I'd made and tried to stop my arm from bleeding. During which, my dad banged on the door and told me to keep it down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 552

You deserved it 212

By nataliepaige - 19/07/2011 04:43 - Canada

Today, I fell asleep while watching an action movie. My newly installed surround sound system scared me so bad that I fell off the couch and smashed my face on our coffee table. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 684

You deserved it 12 352

HowDidIGetHere 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 22:22

Time to get a new dad...

you_failed 15

Sunday 3 April 2011 22:23

Ouchies! But now you know what to do when he's taking a nap... :D

Comments

playboyintown 4

Monday 4 April 2011 4:51

try spraying itching powder on him when he is asleep.

cindayy77 0

Monday 4 April 2011 5:37

yeesh, ouch...

mrdaddy 0

Monday 4 April 2011 6:04

You forgot to add that dads on meth and crack pretty hard these days. in about 3-4 days when he passes out do the same thing to him.

Wiggy_78 0

Monday 4 April 2011 7:17

Ouch, but why did your dad yell in your ear? Weirdo ;)

ianl87 0

Monday 4 April 2011 13:22

awoken isn't a word

nicoleanddrake 0

Monday 11 April 2011 3:52

haha illiterate bitch.

sneeze_watch 19

Monday 4 April 2011 22:01

My dad always used to flip the couch over. I think you got off light.

calley123 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 2:11

well, that's better than being awoken from a nice nap by your brother's butt crack. I've been there, I'd rather be screamed at.

nicoleanddrake 0

Tuesday 5 April 2011 2:17

is the table okay?

fyl12345678901 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 3:05

wwe fail

Drew123987 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 4:40

haha, I've done this before. except replace the table with a lamp;)

Keywords

Work Mental health Students Relatable Kids Parenting Awkward Love Embarrassing Intimacy Wanker Family First Dates AITA Singing Animals Cats Public freakouts Weddings Bodyshaming Transportation Cars Cops Sex Sexism Health Growing old Periods Job interview Education

The Top

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The Top

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You deserved it 147

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You deserved it 7 955

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You deserved it 5 583

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I agree, your life sucks 73 808

You deserved it 4 368

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I agree, your life sucks 37 524

You deserved it 5 142