Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML
Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML
Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML
Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML
Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML
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Top comments
fmh123 0
Ewwww, what the hell
DoomJeff91 2
Sounds like urine his latest adventure.
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Comments (111)
extradorkyloser 4
ewes
curlzanluv17 0
please tell me you kicked his "tenders" for that
Jimboom 12
In some European countrys thats a pick up line. He must have really liked you. ;)
1337Steph 0
Aww, he's claiming you as his territory. Isn't that cute? (:
suckishfather 0
You should have said "OMG EUROPIAN!!!!" hahahahahahahahahaha i'm sorry i had too much sugar tonight!!!!! but that is reaaaaalllly creepy. i wouldve kicked him in the exposed genitaliass!
giganticbrain 0
You're ******* stupid.
KristinaSeliv 0
he's just marking his territory
xARxSold1er 0
what the ****?
NataleeC 0
lmfao! thats so wrong on so many levels. btw thnx guyz 4 makin meh laugh at the little oui oui jokes. lol get it? its french. which is in europe. *aww tough crowd*
NataleeC 0
and its also pronounced wee wee. *sighs*
null_fml 11
FML may have some pretty dumb readers... but don't worry, I don't think that joke went over anyone's head! :P
SiLvEr_070 5
ROFL HAHAHA
ReJecT_98 2
lol ..