Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was at a concert and a man came up behind and started to grind me. I pushed him away. He came back and pissed on my leg. FML
Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML
Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML
Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with some friends. We decided to play chicken and I was on the shoulders of the guy I like. Right as we started playing, for some unearthly reason my body decided to let out a little pee. I thought he wouldn't notice since we were already wet. He did. FML
Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML
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Top comments
fmh123 0
Ewwww, what the hell
DoomJeff91 2
Sounds like urine his latest adventure.
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Comments (111)
Naughtymiss 0
would have punched his lights out!
mo_the_owl 0
GOLDEN SHOWERS!!!!!
Voids 0
He now owns you. Make him a sandwich, bitch. Haha
MoooMooMooMooMoo 0
Nawh seems like it's just a misunderstanding. He was just marking his territory is all =] I think he likes you =D
crumsnatcha 4
I bet you were pretty pissed off.
DoingItWrong 0
I doubt she was pretty if she was pissed on.
EmmaMarieCullen 0
hey well you know it's better to be pissed off than pissed on…. too bad she was both
EmmaMarieCullen 0
hey well you know it's better to be pissed off than pissed on…. too bad she was both
EmmaMarieCullen 0
well ya' know it's better to be pissed off than to be pissed on… too bad OP was both
caosdth 2
i like how many ppl here are understanding of animal rituals, but humans dont do that shit anymore, or ever i believe since i dont think we ever had a good enough sense of smell for that, so haha to the golden showers and that sucks to be you, YAY AVENUE Q
skybeau 0
Yep! Because everyone here was totally serious when they were saying that peeing on a girl is how a guy shows that she's his!
crumsnatcha 4
Not much of a whiz, are you?
whatwasthatnoise 0
Lol that you thought that they were serious points
gothicwench 0
LMAO Captain Obvious makes me sad
NaturallyUnlucky 0
Mmmyesss, keep the puns coming!
elliebutton 0
That's a story to tell the wee ones..
Intoxicunt 6
That wasn't piss. He was that turned on by you.
Peroxide 3
Mabey im old fashioned but back in my day you had to take a lady out to a nice expensive restaurant before she would let you pee on her, if you were lucky.
SiLvEr_070 5
LMAO!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA