Today, I was at a gay bar and asking a really convincing drag queen about her daily routine. I asked how she tucked her penis in. She responded, "Um, I'm a woman." I said, "Oh I'm sorry, are you pre-op or post-op?" She said, "No, I always have been and always will be a woman, asshole." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She replied, "Sorry, I'm suddenly a lesbian." FML
Today, I steeled my nerve, gritted my teeth, pulled my finger out, and asked our new coworker on a date. He looked at me weird, then said those four words, “But I’m not gay.” Five weeks we’ve worked together and all that time he thought I was a man. I’m a woman, born a woman, with a vagina. FML
Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML
Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML
Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML
Today, while shopping, a few giggling girls came up to me and asked why I was wearing a dress in public. Highly confused, I didn't answer. When they walked away laughing, I realized they thought I was a man. I'm a woman. FML
Today, a little girl came up to me and asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" I said, "I'm a girl of course!" She walked away, looking dazed and saying, "Whoa." FML
Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML
Today, I was talking to a friend and bemoaning the fact that my new coworkers keep mixing up my gender. She looked at me critically and said, "Yeah, until you can grow a decent beard, people are going to keep thinking you're an intern or a butch lesbian." FML
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Top comments
jojo1031 0
Aren't those extremely personal questions to be asking? Could we get a transgender/transvestite to weigh in on this discussion?
Ncc_Tardis 0
I clicked YDI, then FML. It's a bit of both, I'vegottaa say, some of them can be pretty damn convincing!
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Comments (165)
k_egan29 0
#22....you obviously have no idea what you're talking about. i have always been a girl...and my index finger is shorter than my ring finger.....so well....you're retarded and should never talk ever again
SPQR_fml 0
why is there a woman at a Gay bar?
Lifey66 0
#119, because she's gay? maybe? lets use our thinking caps for a little bit here.
dancin303 0
i agree with 118 and 115 what the **** are you talking about number 22
mattmag 0
she deserved it because shes in a gay bar. you have nothing to worry about.
desperate_fml 0
i thought it was a GAY bar. for GAY people.
danigirl 0
wtf was she doing at a gay bar?
utinaeniduin 0
agree with 4. how is she gonna sass you when she's a performer at a gay bar.
Chromefox 0
She had to have seen that coming, considering she was let into a GAY bar.
worldisround 0
I find it entertaining that the ad next to this is "Gay Palm Springs, CA" (: