Today, I was at a bar and very drunk. I went to the urinal and when I was done, I went to zip up, then realized I'd never unzipped. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I really had to pee at work and rushed to the urinal. I unzipped but couldn't find the hole in the front of my boxers and ended up pissing my pants. I had put my boxers on backwards. FML
Today, I was sewing a top. Due to a mistake, I had to unstitch the zipper and resew it. When I was almost done, I noticed that the zipper was upside down. FML
Today, I approached the girl I like, hoping to ask her out. Just as I strode up to her, she excused herself as quickly as she could. I then realized I'd forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the bathroom minutes before. FML
Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML
Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML
Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML
Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML
Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML
Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML
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Top comments
superstephen4 5
wow. I can imagine doing that
TheKitsune 0
Don't guys need to... aim? Do you usually just let it flop about while you pee?
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Comments (97)
Jimboom 12
Lol. You totally deserve it. But don't feel too bad. This shit happens when consuming massive amounts of alcohol. I once had a mate who took out one of his bollocks, thought it was his penis and pissed his pants. :P
bre_zip_it_up13 11
when i was in first i shitted in my pants
radman 0
How is this an FML? So he forgot to zip up his pants? Big deal. Lots of people do that every day.
edanvers 0
Nah - think what he's basically saying is, he pissed himself. Cos he never took his willy out of his pants to begin with! OP = Stupid Sod.
_20jre 0
No, he is saying is peed without zipping down the zipper inside his pants.
freudianego 0
In this FML: girls who've never seen a penis.
devils_prisoner 0
dude ,control ur member ,lol out loud , dumbass
Aspie 0
YDI for drinking and YDI even more for getting drunk.
jessimafur 0
So I am guessing you are a guy, hince the urinal. Wouldn't you realize somthings wrong when you have nothing in your hands? So if you are so small to not feel anything in your hands when you go to the bathroom, then that truly is an FML for you :)
sexyzebra7317 0
seriously. does no one know that lol means laugh out loud. youre all dumbasses for putting lol out loud. like.wtf?
desth10 0
Dude that's funny shit I just had a buddy do that over the weekend
boner_93 2
i said lol. out loud. its not that hard to understand when you think about it... lol.