Poopoo peepee, Drunk and Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a bar and very drunk. I went to the urinal and...

By loser - 10/10/2009 20:45 - France

Today, I was at a bar and very drunk. I went to the urinal and when I was done, I went to zip up, then realized I'd never unzipped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 607

You deserved it 61 330

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 15/05/2018 01:30

Today, I really had to pee at work and rushed to the urinal. I unzipped but couldn't find the hole in the front of my boxers and ended up pissing my pants. I had put my boxers on backwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 475

You deserved it 3 735

It's called fashion, OK? Look it up.

By Seamstressed - 09/02/2017 20:00 - Italy

Today, I was sewing a top. Due to a mistake, I had to unstitch the zipper and resew it. When I was almost done, I noticed that the zipper was upside down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 252

You deserved it 1 276

By Tommy - 06/03/2012 18:55 - United States

Today, I approached the girl I like, hoping to ask her out. Just as I strode up to her, she excused herself as quickly as she could. I then realized I'd forgotten to zip up my pants after going to the bathroom minutes before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 783

You deserved it 23 393

By not cool - 28/06/2013 05:16 - Australia - Sunnybank

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 854

You deserved it 3 182

By Blie - 04/09/2018 20:30

Today, I was so drunk that I pissed myself in a hotel hallway while wearing a dress. My shoes squished all the way back to the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 072

You deserved it 4 252

By Anonymous - 19/11/2012 21:08 - United States - Nutley

Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 682

You deserved it 6 164

Fast and Furious

By TooQuick - 27/04/2016 12:19 - Mozambique - Maputo

Today, after a 2-hour meeting, I rushed to take an urgent dump. Unbeknownst to me, my urine was not hitting the porcelain bowl, but rather the underside of the lid. As it pooled around the pedestal, it soaked my pants, underwear, and when I stood up to button my pants, it got on my shirt too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 051

You deserved it 2 808

By feelinnauseous - 24/06/2009 16:48 - United States

Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 032

You deserved it 15 740

By webperson04 - 27/07/2009 19:07 - United States

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 450

You deserved it 3 614

By goldenshower - 05/02/2010 18:22 - United States

Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 511

You deserved it 56 562

superstephen4 5

Sunday 11 October 2009 1:25

wow. I can imagine doing that

TheKitsune 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 1:28

Don't guys need to... aim? Do you usually just let it flop about while you pee?

Comments

TheLoneWolf87 4

Friday 27 November 2009 2:36

He was drunk, Pastor Dipshit

stepup0220 0

Monday 28 December 2009 21:14

lmao!

ydi_4_suking 20

Wednesday 17 November 2010 6:23

Dang I thought he was gonna say he zipped a veiny member up

PapSmearNinja 4

Thursday 7 July 2011 11:52

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha lmfao

gracefulbrick 0

Tuesday 23 August 2011 0:49

This could go either way... You coils have just pissed in your pants, or had your fly down the whole time...

askbanana 0

Wednesday 30 November 2011 22:23

#9 maybe OP doesnt remember, maybe they just woke up later and found their pants wet...

bryan788 29

Tuesday 4 September 2012 6:44

that sucks,

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The Top

Today, it was the last day of school, and I said goodbye to one of my students. She then told me how to correctly pronounce her name. I'd said it wrong all year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 877

You deserved it 12 631

Today, I finally moved all my boxes into my new apartment. I was settling in when my alarm clock that was stashed in one of the boxes began ringing. Two hours and several boxes later, I still can't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 765

You deserved it 5 819

Today, I spent hours delicately writing out what seemed to be a beautiful poem to my girlfriend. After I sent it to her, I kept eyeing my phone to see her surprised message. No, the only response I got was, "You may want to use a spellcheck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 056

You deserved it 26 305

Today, I offered my seat to an elderly lady on the subway. She quietly refused. Minutes later on a sharp turn, she almost fell down on two people. As I was clearly the youngest in the disability seating section, everyone on the train turned and glared at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 754

You deserved it 3 974

Today, I got home to find my mom sitting in the kitchen reading the mail. I saw an empty bottle of Absolut peach vodka on the counter. Surprised, I picked it up and said "Wow, who drinks this?" Her reply was "Why don't you tell me? I found it in your room." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 410

You deserved it 77 416

Just to piss me off... You nugget!

I agree, your life sucks 304

You deserved it 69

Same thing different taste

It's called fashion, OK? Look it up.

Fast and Furious

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