Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML
Today, I was asleep in my back garden and woke up when a bird landed on my hat and took a big shit right in my open mouth. FML
Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML
Today, I was watching a beautiful flock of birds flying overhead while walking in the street. The guy next to me was lucky enough to catch bird poop with his forehead. I was lucky enough to get distracted by it, trip, and break my ankle. FML
Today, I was sitting on the back porch with my husband. I felt two raindrops land on my head, so I said we should go inside because it was starting to rain. It turned out to just be a bird shitting on me. FML
Today, a bird shit on my jacket whilst smoking, I cleaned it and went back outside, and got shit on again. FML
Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML
Today, I was unloading tile boxes out of my pickup truck into this lady's garage. As I grabbed the last 50-pound box, a passing bird shat on my forehead. Green ooze ran down my whole face. FML
Today, a bird flew into the workshop where I work, gave itself a tour of the place, then promptly pooped on my lunch and left. FML
Today, it looked like rain so I held out my hand to catch a raindrop. When I finally caught one, I closed my hand over it and ran to show my friends to prove it was raining. I opened my hand saying, "Look! It's raining!" When I looked down, I saw that I had actually caught a bird shit. FML
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Top comments
Ambient25 25
I hope you didn't have your mouth open
gc327072 31
Damn, it's only Wednesday and you're already getting shitfaced? I wanna party with you, OP!
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Comments (76)
ufuqinkiddin 5
Never, EVER, look up into a tree when underneath it! Bird shit is the least of the horrors unleashed by trees, especially when you are right underneath them!
Ki11erC 18
Are birds that rare to you? OMG a bird in a tree, must stop.
DevilsAltair 8
Was your mouth open?
janeth1474 8
stuff like this is why I'm scares to walk under birds
cheshireau 26
Yep, they do that.
JETarchitect 32
That's supposed to be lucky!
jonesy4 4
Well my brother had a bird shit on his birthday cake if that makes you feel bettter