Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to scare a new college friend by sneaking up behind...

By only1bigdogme - 03/09/2011 05:24 - United States

Today, I tried to scare a new college friend by sneaking up behind her wearing a mask. It worked. And so did her lightning fast reflexes developed from multiple martial arts championships. My 2 cracked ribs, broken nose and bruised ballsack can now be added to her list of achievements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 759

You deserved it 53 211

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
When lilies of the valley bring good luck... or not! Discover the stories behind every little bell! More…

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Same thing different taste

By boo! - 17/02/2009 08:25 - United States

Today, I saw my friend across campus, and I decided that I wanted to play a trick on her and scare her from behind. Turns out, I scared a complete stranger with really bad panic induced asthma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 528

You deserved it 42 974

By Karate Kid - 25/05/2012 06:29 - Australia - Surry Hills

Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 972

You deserved it 35 358

By BadassNinja - 05/09/2009 16:22 - United States

Today, I tried to impress my girlfriend by punching through a piece of old drywall karate kid-style. As it turns out, the drywall was actually a thin piece of concrete. I now have a busted hand and a girlfriend with a new story to tell all her friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 798

You deserved it 51 092

By Anonymous - 29/06/2014 17:26 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my wife has a bruise on her cheek from a nasty trip while practicing her yoga. She now thinks it's hilarious to flinch in public when I get near her, and keeps telling people she "walked into a door". I've gotten more dirty looks than I can count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 317

You deserved it 5 165

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 789

You deserved it 81 424

By -_- - 05/07/2013 21:59 - United States - Munith

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 573

You deserved it 5 224

How d'you like them apples?

By Anonymous - 29/10/2022 14:00

Today, after my girlfriend played a prank on me a few days ago, I thought she’d be a good sport about me playing one back. Turns out she’s not a good sport. I’m now single, with black bruises on my ribs. I think one might even be broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 196

By no more flips - 17/05/2015 14:05 - United States - Columbus

Today, I decided to impress my friends by doing a flip on the trampoline. What did impress them, was my lack of tears after I hit the edge of the trampoline and broke my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 773

You deserved it 7 036

By inpain - 17/03/2016 04:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in my self-defense class, we did an attack simulation. As I began to hit my attacker, my fist hit the top of his helmet, dislocating my shoulder. I then spent the next hour in the ER sobbing until it was popped back in. I need to learn to defend myself against myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 888

You deserved it 2 402

By Nerrh - 12/03/2011 10:53 - Australia

Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 232

You deserved it 33 634

DirtyPicture_fml 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 15:57

Dumbass -__-

orphinz 3

Saturday 3 September 2011 15:59

On the bright side... It worked?

Comments

BroSkii69 8

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:08

Achievements? What is this, xbox live?

92910bg 4

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:18

Yes

humorizer 14

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:40

You're an idiot. Did you pay a monthly fee? No? Then it's obviously Playstation Network or Wii "online".

IDontKnow10101 14

Saturday 3 September 2011 17:26

Wii never have and never will have achievements

harrywestt 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 17:40

Lol would of never thought of that one

trooper250 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 18:27

Someones been playing too much video games

PocketRockette 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:31

Girl power.......it's a doozy

stephen0819 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:32

Smooth move, Daniel-San

k1ngd1ck 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:34

That's what u get for making new friends

UnfOrg1ven 1

Sunday 4 September 2011 0:21

how's that bad? Imake new friends but I dont scare them or prank them

ShadowLuffer 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:37

Never EVER try to scare a girl. It'll scare us, but we'll take our revenge. Hard.

ImInABox 6

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:37

Bahahahahahahaha... I laugh at your pain obviously. You don't scare girls. It's almost guaranteed that you'll get a swift kick to the balls.

Cheesey_Dorito 11

Monday 24 December 2018 19:05

"Oh no this man scared me! Better make him sterile to teach a lesson!" Shut the **** up

wisericky 12

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:40

She falls under the "Crazy Bitch" category, dont **** with her.

Emmy_The_Great 2

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:40

U mad?

endlessman 0

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:43

I guess you could say she *puts on sun glasses* rocked your balls

Slimma 20

Saturday 3 September 2011 16:45

You deserved this one completely. Its a lot better attempting to scare your older friends than a brand new one because at least then you know what they could do to you if you succeed.