Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML
Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML
Today, I woke up, only to find my arm was still asleep. I tried to move it just a tiny bit, but somehow ended up punching myself in the face. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad, so we went to the edge of a cliff to relieve ourselves. He peed and it came and hit me in the face. He did it on purpose, so I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML
Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML
Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML
Today, I tried to pull the old "bucket of water above the door" prank on my brother, but the bucket didn't fall when he opened the door. He noticed it, took it down, then pinned me to the floor and waterboarded me with the ice-cold water. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DearCricket 0
Instant Karma :)
dragonaair 5
You deserve it, asshole.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (72)
Peacewind 0
Mythbusters already busted that putting someones hand into warm water will make them pee themselves. YDI for not listening to the Gods of Science Adam and Jamie! *smite!*
IReadAlotOfFmls 0
Actually Cinn, I am very mature it just happens to be 1:30 AM and I'm bored out of my mind so excuse my post if it happens to offened you - Ethan.
Cinn_fml 23
That is fair enough. I'm just used to people saying things like that in a hater way. I do apologise for assuming you were too. God those trolls have affected me more than I realised.
Doopliss01 0
Gal.. seriously
Cinn_fml 23
Who was that aimed at, Doopliss?
IReadAlotOfFmls 0
No problem, damnthose trolls! (;
draciel65 1
Chuck Norris punch!
iHateThisLife 10
Fail!
Nyc__Princess 0
what eles did you think was gonna happen ?
Whoabro 0
What does YDI mean? D:
Nyc__Princess 0
You Deserve It
soul_fml 0
You Die Inahole
IReadAlotOfFmls 0
I got this :D it means You Deserve It :D
dcam13 19
yeah even if your plan worked and you made him pee, what do you think he would have done to you then?? bahaha ydi!!
cutlass81 6
54 has a point. YDI for not succeeding and still getting punched. epic fail