Today, I tried to keep a drunk girl from driving by holding her keys, but she had a spare set in her purse. She hit me with her car when I was walking home. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to stop a drunk girl from driving home. She took a couple swings at me, which I dodged. Feeling pretty good about it, I tried to get the keys from her hand. She leaned over, and sunk her teeth in to my bare shoulder. The doctor says I will have a scar. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Today, I got shitfaced at a club. A cute girl I'd met earlier in the evening offered to drive me home in my car and spend the night with me. She crashed my car and did a runner before the cops showed up. They wouldn't believe my story. I now have a wrecked car and a DUI. FML
Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
Today, I saw a drunk woman drop her purse in the street. I picked it up and went to give it to her, only for her to scream at me for being a thief. Then she started crying, apologized and hugged me, then got angry again, and finally threw up on me. FML
Today, a drunk in a wheelchair tried to fight me. I walked away as he kept hurling insults. He then rammed his chair into my legs, making me fall. I walked away again. Upon the second time, I got up and punched him dead in his face, knocking him backward. I was tackled to the ground for hitting him. FML
Today, while my friend and I signed the guest-book at a wedding, the drunk guy at our table stole my friend's painkillers and car keys before getting into a cab. Didn't need the painkillers, definitely needed the keys. FML
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Top comments
baileys82 0
good on you for trying to keep her off the road. i hope this was reported to the police.
Tubasaurus 0
You called the police right? She committed at least 3 serious crimes by doing that. DUI, public intoxication (depending on state laws), and assault with a deadly weapon (also depending on state laws). She at least needs to be aware of how serious this is.
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Comments (106)
whoaparrot 0
To everybody who thinks that the OP was unfair in stranding the girl: When my dad was at a party in high school, he tried to keep his drunk friend from driving away on his motorcycle by asking for his keys. The guy would not give him the keys. My dad had to knock him out to keep him from getting on the motorcycle. His friend's answer to that the next day? "Thank you." He knew my dad had potentially saved his life. Odds are that's all this girl would have cared about once she was sober (or at least I hope).
kvgf1484 0
Nah, the OP did the right thing. Although once he found out that she had a spare set of keys I think he should have phoned the cops and reported her for DUI and dangerous driving (like someone mentioned before) then she would have gotten put in the drunk tank for the night and a DUI charge. Then hopefully she would plan ahead for next time she went to a party. Yikes, I hope you're okay and not too badly hurt by her.
kk3211 0
were you killed?
lologirl419 0
You had really great intentions, and I so admire people like you! The ones who marked YDI have no idea how hard it is to do what you did. But maybe you should have driven her home? Or at least called a cab. And did you know her well, or at least have her phone number, so you could give her keys back? It's kinda mean to steal her keys... -_-
fchandlerslife 0
key her car
uberchicken 0
Throw her in the toilet.
Escapist28 0
I'm kind of confused about this situation. Either you took her key, found out she had a spare key and left her alone anyway, or you took what you thought was her only key and left her alone in the middle of God knows where. I understand that your intentions were good, but these don't seem like the best ways to handle the situation. And to anyone who said he deserved it, that's just sick. Sure, this girl shouldn't have driven herself somewhere and gotten drunk, but the bottom line is that it happened, and leaving her stranded isn't going to help anyone. Being an idiot doesn't mean you deserve to be put in a situation where your judgment is completely shot and potentially dangerous things could happen. If this girl deserves to be taught a lesson for getting drunk, then let her conk herself out for a little while and wake her up with some bright lights and loud music. Don't leave her somewhere where she could be mugged, kidnapped, raped, etc.
lich_fml 0
good for you. I have soooo much respect for you at least TRYING to keep her off the road.
master565 0
if u didn't know the girl u should have just tryed to convince her not to. and if she doesn't listen screw her
paulthemapguy 0
You absolutely DID NOT DESERVE THAT ONE.