Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML
Today, after complaining all my life that no one makes a decent can opener, I have realised that I have been using them the wrong way. I finally figured out that the cutting blade goes on the SIDE of the can not the TOP. I'm 57 years old. FML
Today, I spent my lunch break trying to open a jar of pickles that had been stuck for weeks. I finally gave up and asked a coworker for help. He tapped the lid once with a spoon and it opened immediately. I'd been fighting a pickle jar every day for a month. FML
Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML
Today, I struggled to open a childproof bottle, which, by the way, had the instructions printed on the lid. FML.
Today, I attempted to open a water bottle. My hand started bleeding before I was able to get the cap loose. FML
Today, I tried drinking "Smart Water" for the first time. I couldn't figure out how to open the bottle. FML
Today, I tried to open a jar by tapping the lid on the counter. I tapped it so hard, the jar shattered, and I now have more spaghetti sauce on my pyjama pants than in the pot. FML
Today, while I brewed myself a cup of coffee, my best friend began screwing around with a can opener like it was nunchucks. He looked at me and said, "Wouldn't it suck if…" as he flung it around, and one of the handles flew off, directly into my testicles. FML
Today, I couldn't open a jar of mayo and my cousin had to open it for me. She's a 16 year-old girl and I'm a 24 year-old guy. FML
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Top comments
jim69_fml 0
seriously it's not that hard to use a manual can opener.... tard
tati3092 1
hahah ur a little slow or alot
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Comments (253)
bamagrl410 31
... And you can dress yourself? Amazing.
illjusbedamned 0
you shouldn't be allowed to eat.
at0micmin3r 23
Today, I read that someone can't even use a can opener. They got dumbed down by technology. Really? A can opener? FML
chocolatemocha 0
If you can't figure out how to use a manual can opener, you obviously have some problems. I agree with the biggest fail thing though.
dtegrl 0
Really...? Really...? Are your parents brother and sister?
al3xg 0
WTF
BIGshooter 2
Bro you are fail super tard.
Sharpie_08 0
jack ass
gunman15 4
finally someone stupider than me now I can proudly tell people that I'm not the dumbest person one earth
stewpididiot 11
WWDS ? What Would Darwin Say ? he'd say " HEY!!! YOU !!!! OUTA THE GENE POOL !!!! "