Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I suspected something was up when my boyfriend snuck out of bed after he thought I fell asleep. I caught him jerking to porn in the living room and got really upset. He actually got mad, saying, "I have needs and you never put out and get bitchy when I try." FML
Today, I came home early from work and caught my boyfriend jerking off. When I tried to flirt and say I could help him, he said he wasn't in the mood anymore. He hasn't touched me in months. FML
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home, he was masturbating. FML
Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's apartment. He started coming on to me so I pushed him away and said, "No chance." He said "Well, I'm horny, so I'm gonna take care of it myself. Can you go home now?" FML
Today, my boyfriend said he was too tired to have sex with me because he'd spent the whole day jerking off. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jacking it. He wouldn't continue and let me watch. FML
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Top comments
MissWhitneyB 17
Next time when he wants some, push him off and point to his computer and tell him to enjoy.
flashback.miss 28
Well, next time he wants a *******, tell him you're not in the mood and enjoy a nice banana.
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Comments (144)
justindrew14 29
sorry abour boss op but atleast u wasn`t fired right
lazy_girl 12
Wrong FML, buddy. This is a lesson: don't comment after getting high lol But, I do admire the way you combined the words "about" and "your" into "abour"... very creative :)
dontgivafuk 9
good thing you pointed that out. I liked the way your amazing grasp of the obvious kept us all from wondering what was going on here. thanks.
ramidaguiar 2
Maybe he is gay and was watching gay ****. You should get rid of him. FYL
Tressa1982 18
talk to him and if it continues ...see ya!
acrouch 9
Maybe he was in the mood a 1/2 hour later?
lvg_fml 10
RUN. I was in a marriage where my ex was addicted to ************ and wasn't that into regular sex. It sucked. Run now
powerhunger 4
I love how people think it's a crime when a guy doesn't want to have sex.
iwadasn 33
It wasn't that he didn't want to have sex. He clearly just didn't want to have sex with HER, which is a problem if they're getting married.
Neopopulas 9
Maybe he.. i dunno.. wasn't in the mood? When women aren't in the mood its just something people accept as a thing that happens. Oh, she's not in the mood, women are tough like that. but if its a guy, suddenly they're douchebags. Maybe he didn't feel like having sex, maybe he wasn't in the mood, maybe he didn't want all the time and effort of sex, maybe he just wanted to whack it for a few minutes and not also have to worry about foreplay and the rubix cube that is female biology.
Bunny21 11
Wow if this is happening BEFORE marriage I can only imagine what it'll be like once you're married. Good luck OP but it seems like you guys really need to talk this out. PRONTO!
lilmrspatterson 0
This sort of thing lead to my divorce...it sucks
dontgivafuk 9
you caused it. admit it you are a boring sex partner.
perdix 31
How many windows? Looks like you're going to need to arrange an (x + 1)some!