Today, I told my students that I would be absent tomorrow because my wife was giving birth. They burst into applause... not to congratulate me on the new baby. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, I told my students that I would be taking a few weeks off because a member of my family is very ill. They all cheered. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Today, at my job as a second grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML
Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
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Top comments
NoBounceNoPlay 0
So, you're that teacher who everybody hates but is never absent, huh?
3lonelyhearts3 0
Kids are always like that. why is this an fml?
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Comments (159)
brittbrittT 0
hey guys im gonna keep commenting on this. and as a student, if a teacher says that to my class i applaud because i ******* hate them. but hey maybe its just me? nawt.
Rawrrr14 0
Well, what do a bunch of kids know right? Congratulations! Hope all goes well!
CrayHawk 0
Maybe they were applauding on the fact that the teacher got laid?
anonymous_user 0
dont worry kids are bitches
jet_fml 0
It's because subs don't make you do any work. Nothing personal, unless you're an asshole.
HelloStarshine 0
It's not that they don't like you. Whenever a substitute is taking your place, they never have to do any work. They're probably hoping for a movie or something. Unless you're an ass... then that changes everything.
catatonicsleep 17
When I was born my Dad's class bought me a toy dog, maybe they will do something similar?
simplyme138 0
im in highschool and thats totally common lol!!!!! when subs ae there u an tell them hey we do this on a daily basis and they say ok!
serious1y 0
brittbrittT - i hope when you get out of middle school you'll realize the world isn't about you. i promise you'll be a lot happier and your friends will stop being 'backstabbers' and 'bitches' when you stop hating.
Jertastic 0
How do teachers not get this? Students don't like them. They enjoy when they have a sub and hate it when the teacher is there.