Today, at my job as a second grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML
Today, I told my students that I would be absent tomorrow because my wife was giving birth. They burst into applause... not to congratulate me on the new baby. FML
Today, I got a call from my daughter's pre-school. Apparently, she is being suspended, for answering; "What do your parents do at home?" She told them, "My parents fuck." FML
Today, as a natural science teacher, I was drawing a uterus on the class chalkboard. One of my students started messing around and being noisy, so I shouted, "Be quiet and check out my uterus!" FML
Today, I found out my sex-ed teacher from high school was married and had her first child while she herself was still in high school. Looks like she didn't pay enough attention in sex-ed. FML
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Today, I had to call a parent and tell them that their special needs daughter is pregnant. FML
Today, a senior girl in my college-level biology course asked our professor what periods are like when you’re pregnant. FML
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Top comments
Leeono 26
Well they’re not wrong....
NostalgiaFreak9 43
You must be dreading that call home.
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Comments (19)
NostalgiaFreak9 43
You must be dreading that call home.
Leeono 26
Well they’re not wrong....
Glowworm56 27
At least this kid already knows the gist of where babies come from.
RichardPencil 32
Plot twist: Ms. Johnson is pregnant via in-vitro fertilization with an anonymous sperm donor, so no, she hasn’t had sex in a long time! That’s your FML there!
mas12806 24
Truth hurts don’t it
LAUGHINGKOMODO 25
Is this an FML because you don't want to call their parents?
dexter420 21
Was he the father?
jbuckets_404 39
Dexter, the 2nd grader?! Or his father?
Tarlachia 33
Only one way it could’ve been said to greater shock: “Oooooh Ms. Johnson got the johnson and she liked it!”
OlRed 28
What ever happened to explaining pregnancy two kids as an overflow of love. Now it’s Ms. Johnson did the dirty with Mr. Johnson.
ThrottleJockey 36
Or at least with some other johnson.
Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20
he's just happy for you :)