Today, I told my students that I would be absent tomorrow because my wife was giving birth. They burst into applause... not to congratulate me on the new baby. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Nervous
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, I told my students that I would be taking a few weeks off because a member of my family is very ill. They all cheered. FML
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a father. Too bad I can't tell my wife. FML
Correct
Today, at my job as a second grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML
News to me
Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
How d'you think?
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I was told by my wife that we were going to be parents. We are both females. FML
Today, my friend thought it would be funny to announce to the class that I finally got a girlfriend. I received a standing ovation. FML
Top comments
NoBounceNoPlay 0
So, you're that teacher who everybody hates but is never absent, huh?
3lonelyhearts3 0
Kids are always like that. why is this an fml?
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Comments (159)
Zog21 0
Mr. Bowe - HAHAHAHA YOU GOT OWNED That was so funny we were all like yes sub tommarrow and shit.
isantorin 0
Dude. They're students. You really think they care, and if they did, you reaaally think they'd show it? YDI for being too sensitive.
dmzelda203 0
Aw, don't feel too bad. I'm sure it's nothing personal against you; the kids just know that a substitute means an easier workload!
brittbrittT 0
thatcathlolicgirl- go read your bible. thanks.
dg72592_fml 0
they didn't mean anything by it... as a high school student i can honestly say i would be happy to have a sub no matter which teacher was absent, everyone knows subs don't make you do anything
pvgoalie23 0
hahahahaha,u suck at being a teacher, at my school we hate the subs
leilipop 0
maybe they were congratulating you for getting laid. you never know....
gislince 0
don't be sad, students are all the same .. they just want to do nothing at alll... it doesn't matter if u're good or not
brittbrittT 0
thatcatholicgirl - wooooooooooooooow. thats all i have to say.
TheQuiet 2
wow brittbritt you suck. OP, don't even mind the kids in your class, you've got a lot more to think about now! Congrats!