Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers and "do it like deer". FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend admitted that he'd like to dress me in a squirrel suit and chase me through the forest. This was the surprising result of a discussion on how to spice up our love life. FML
Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML
Tiger King
Today, I asked my wife how we could spice up our sex life. She wants me to dress up and talk like Joe Exotic. No, she wasn’t kidding. FML
Get it on
Today, my husband's version of roleplaying was pretending that he actually wanted to have sex with me. FML
Groucho
Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML
Captain Jack
Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML
Hard pass
Today, my husband drunkenly confessed that he has a shit fetish and wants to watch me take a dump in the bathtub while he jerks off. Guess him saying he "didn't like kinky things" was a lie, then. FML
Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML
Easy
Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML
Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML
Top comments
twinkiefeets 17
Oh deer!
Pretty_reckless_fml 18
At least you can be his sexy little vixen! You don't hoof to do it of course, but fur your husband you might want to get into the festive spirit and have a little fawn with him
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Comments (116)
mosquito19 14
that's gross yo, wild animals are covered with flies
lostcrazydiamond 10
Deer style is the next doggie style. Get with the program, people.
AliensAteMyUncle 3
That's not so bad, OP. At least he didn't want to do it like a dog...they KNOT...
AliensAteMyUncle 3
You're sure you asked for his WILDEST fantasy and not his WILDLIFE fantasy? ;)
destroyu 8
As a hunter I can't even be excited by this comment I'm sorry for your fantasy life
HeyHeyFishFillet 34
First time in a while where I actually laughed at an FML.
SmittyJA24 26
Uhhh, is he from Idaho?
Nbrandwine 7
That's not the only thing that's going to be red and shiny...
HardWorkingDude 4
Oh deer, sounds like he's horny.
godfathermock 19
It could have been worse...