Today, I still can't decide whether masturbating while looking at myself makes me narcissistic or just plain pathetic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was posing in front of the mirror, when I realized that everyone who looks at me can easily tell which arm I use to masturbate. FML
Today, I fell asleep while masturbating. I'm so bad that I bore myself. FML
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML
Today, I realised just how lazy I am when I was about to masturbate, but decided not to because I didn't want to put in the effort. FML
Today, I know it’s pathetic to cry after sex, so you can imagine how pathetic I feel when I cry after masturbating, because cleaning my vibrator afterwards just reminds me how long it’s been since I had a man, and how lonely I am. FML
Today, I'm horny as hell, but I'm such a germaphobe that I don't want to be touched by anyone else, and now, after looking in the mirror and seeing how disgusting I look, I can't even touch myself, not with a vibrator, my hand or a 10-foot pole. FML
Today, I realized I masturbate too much when I got turned on by the smell of my shampoo. FML
Today, I realized that masturbating to pictures of my girlfriend is better than having sex with her. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
perdix 31
If you have a big dick, it's narcissistic. If you have a little winky, it's hilarious!
doctorhook86 25
I don't see a gender on this FML, so I'm choosing to believe that Megan Fox wrote it.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (141)
SmackinSluts 1
You need to get laid.
Smilebaileyboo 0
it makes u sexy
kayliers 5
Um. Ew.
MU_City 0
Haha kind of pathetic dude
15949058 4
Ummmmmmmm I think it depends on what makes you happy.
corinna12124 0
Ur pathetic
I_am_original 1
If you are a female it is narcissism, if you are male it is being pathetic.
mrsmaglietta 6
It makes you sexy
dr3amcatchr 2
You really Don't know which it is? It's narcissistic! Jeez. Hahahaha
ZombieKitteh 8
I've always wondered if an attractive gay person could do that. Seems like there's no way it could work if you're straight.