Today, I sent a girl a friendly conversation starter on Facebook. She replied, "I know what you guys are like. Oh, and that invitation to a date in about 5 messages time? Not a chance." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I sent a message on Facebook to a girl I really like. She replied, "..." It took me three hours to realize she'd actually written it. I thought it was just Facebook telling me she was typing. FML
Today, I finally worked up the courage to start a Facebook chat with a guy I really like. It went so well, and he even agreed to hang out sometime. Seconds after we finished our conversation, he changed his status to, "Desperate bitches really piss me off." FML
Today, after pouring my heart out to a beautiful girl on Facebook, and having her return the favor, she typed a final message that read, "That was my friend. Please f*ck off now. Thanks." FML
Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML
Today, I sent a text to the girl I've been getting to know online, text which was meant for my best friend. It was a screenshot of my her Instagram page with the caption, "I can't believe I'm actually going to talk to her today." FML
Today, after being played like Playstation 5 by so many girls, I decided to give a chance to the girl who used to be my best friend and who I turned down. I went on Facebook to hit her up. First thing I see on my feed is her engagement photos. FML
Today, I sent a group text round to my friends asking if they wanted to hang out sometime. One of my friends thought this was aimed directly at her and confessed her love for me. FML
Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML
Today, I sent a Facebook friend request to my ex. This afternoon I notice that they had accepted, and had left a message for me in my inbox. Asking how they knew me. FML
Today, after seeing a girl for a few weeks on and off I sent her a text to see if she wanted to go out the next saturday. Predictive text changed "go" to "in". So..."Why don't we in out on saturday?" She stopped calling me. FML
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Top comments
Marmarfarfar 25
She is very sure of herself...
Antares_01 9
Shoulda just showed her up and went like "what date?.. I just wanted to know more about (her friend). Who said anything about asking you out?"
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Comments (118)
Headcrab 29
Good thing the bitch came out before you started dating her. At least she saved you the hassle of dumping her.
katties 27
I have a friend that gets a lot of messages from guys she doesn't know wanting to "get to know her". She really doesn't want to get to know people through facebook first. She kindly asks them to **** off if they begin asking her about sex, but she never insults a guy just for sending her a message, although she often writes back that she isn't interested in chatting with them on facebook. The girl you sent a message to was a bit mean though - there are better ways of telling guys off. I would still suggest you trying to talk to people in real life maybe - I know a lot of girls that think it's creepy when a guy she doesn't know sends her messages over facebook.
peachykeenLNG 13
Well she's direct! A lot of girls get real tired real fast of constantly getting hit on. Her being honest actually saves you a lot of time you can spend pursuing girls that might actually be interested in you, and she saved you having to be led on or let down after god knows how long you'd have wasted trying to pursue her.
3rdbass 9
Sent a girl* *shallow ***** Fix'd.
DeathBunny218 37
The word ***** is thrown around too often, if anything this shows that she isn't a *****.
3rdbass 9
If she refuses to actually communicate to get to know a person, I can safely assume she goes by looks, which equals shallow. Plus, she assumed OP's intentions were to ask her on a date and not just talk to her on a platonic level. Her mind is already set to "they all wanna hit it" Thus I believe shallow ***** will suffice for now.
katties 27
She may already like someone and don't need any random guys hitting on her
nyxiny 22
If she was a stranger, this is really sketchy. Having been the recipient of strangers hitting on me in Facebook messages previously, it's really uncomfortable. It's not like a dating website where your information is hidden-- these people know your full name, AND have a picture of you. It's really stalkery.
VeganVampyre 27
True. I've had total strangers send me friend requests and messages and its especially creepy for me because I'm nearly impossible to find (I've had friends search my name to add me and they said I just wasn't there) so how and why did they find and add me? It would never cross my mind to search some random stranger and send them a message, why the hell would I when I can talk to people I actually know and not seem like a total creeper.
JACKxRAWR 22
I've had some very strange friend requests on facebook too (I had a middle-aged scottish woman and several American Justin Bieber fans try to friend me). However, if a facebook stalker wants to graduate to real life stalking they can be my guest. I'll crack 'em across the jaw with my mag-lite. :)
vladimirnabokov 15
Are girls really becoming that shallow? Jesus Christ there's no hope for me now. Sorry OP. **** her.
beastseclipse 9
He tried. Just didn't get that far.
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
"I know what you guys are like"... Well I guess she is planning to stay single her whole life... Talk about stereotypes...
Omniprism 15
Wow she's kind of a bitch.
SWC_Penguin 17
Ugh, you sound like the kind of person that talks to people on Facebook that you don't know in real life. This makes you a romance-telemarketer and I can think of nothing creepier. YDI
marcranger 29
So she's a bitch because she rejected OP before he could invest time and get his hopes up, and I bet she'd also be a bitch if she had exchanged the requisite five messages before rejecting him. Guess a girl just can't win here, eh?
Radoh 3
What the hell are you talking about? He was having a conversation ffs, it didn't need to have a set up for asking someone out, people talk to each other on Facebook without having to want to sex them.
marcranger 29
Bullshit. I doubt OP would be posting this if he weren't butthurt about being rejected before he even got the chance to ask. Most likely, as one of the previous commenters suggested, he's bitching to FML because she figured out his strategy and called him out on it.
Radoh 3
Or he posted it to point out that she's batshit insane and she's full of herself.