Kids: Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He... - FML

By Fffhjno - 28/09/2016 18:15 - United States - Providence

Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 106

You deserved it 1 195

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
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Same thing different taste

By DENTALITY - 23/05/2015 11:06 - Norway

Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 051

You deserved it 3 663

By clean - 16/09/2013 07:51 - Australia - Ashfield

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 159

You deserved it 4 279

By Anonymous - 16/10/2017 01:30

Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 884

You deserved it 468

By shoelace18 - 06/09/2009 04:19 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old swallowed her loose tooth, which she was going put under her pillow for the toothfairy. My wife then told her 'what goes in must come out'. And now everytime she does number 2, she makes me dig for her lost tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 874

You deserved it 5 954

By savanah_aaron - 31/03/2017 20:00

Today, I have to use the same techniques to trick my 24-year-old husband into brushing his teeth, as I do my 2-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 934

You deserved it 723

By dani0810 - 22/01/2013 11:39 - Canada - Sudbury

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 202

You deserved it 5 493

Learning curve

By Anonymous - 16/08/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 063

You deserved it 489

By Gahh... - 03/12/2012 05:18 - Canada - Surrey

Today, I had to show my husband a video on how to brush your teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 030

You deserved it 2 958

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 547

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 599

You deserved it 2 891

Next

Top comments

MessedUpLife00 13

Monday 17 October 2016 3:02

New all natural floss! Get it now! Only $2.99 per container!

tmj25789 23

Monday 17 October 2016 3:05

Well the plus side is he got protein from the earthworm.

Comments

mattyiscool123 26

Monday 17 October 2016 4:59

Looks like a new life hack

creditless 14

Monday 17 October 2016 4:59

earthworms are great for really hard to reach spots... he's brilliant!

MonsterMc 7

Monday 17 October 2016 5:36

Wait what?! I babysit a lot (I'm a guy) and almost every single time there is that ONE kid that does this? Do Utah children just like to floss with earthworms?!?

blackrose1996 11

Monday 17 October 2016 5:49

At least he tried

CamBamShamDaMan 26

Monday 17 October 2016 6:27

Well, hes tryin and thats what matters.

Solano2580 24

Monday 17 October 2016 8:22

At least it's learning.

MissMizery 19

Monday 17 October 2016 9:18

Is your son's name Shrek?? Lol

d123454321b 14

Monday 17 October 2016 9:42

At least he is learning to floss at an early age!!

cuz803 44

Tuesday 18 October 2016 2:17

OP he's just being resourceful. Worms eat bacteria, so he's letting the worm eat the bacteria from his teeth. Now your son has pearly whites, and the worm has had dinner. win win

1DreamCatcher1 20

Tuesday 18 October 2016 11:39

Kids will literally put anything and everything in their mouths. My sister tried to eat a slug when she was little, I tried to eat a woodlouse.

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Today, my dad, who never supported us growing up, and who calls once a month to collect his monthly living expenses, gave me an ultimatum: either buy him a plane ticket so that he can come live with me forever (he's a raging alcoholic) OR to send him $4,500 US Dollars (which where he lives is someone's 6 month salary). FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 103

Today, my boyfriend came over. We'd planned on losing out virginities today. What we didn't plan on was having my 9-year-old brother and his friends making a video of "What teens do when no one is home." They taped the whole thing, including the five minutes it took us to get the condom on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 966

You deserved it 931

The Top

Today, I learnt what my boss meant when he said he would 'get his revenge on me' for winning a bet. I have to clean all the rooms that currently have a couple staying in it on February 15th. I don't want to work in a hotel anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 048

You deserved it 1 668

Today, I flew to England to visit my boyfriend, who has been working there for the past three months. I went to his hotel and waited for him; he never showed up. I called one of his colleagues to ask him what was going on. He had no idea what I was talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 033

You deserved it 3 843

Today, my husband and I arrived in Barbados on vacation. We visited a club, and they had a selection of drinks with weird names. My husband ordered one called the Raging Bitch, flicked his finger towards me, and said to the barkeeper, "Might as well get something I'm used to." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 864

You deserved it 11 290

Today, it was my son’s birthday. I took him out to a eat and wanted to surprise him with a new iPhone. I handed the waitress the iPhone and asked her to bring it out with the cake I brought. The cake comes out, without the iPhone. The waitress said she doesn’t know what I’m talking about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 1 291

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 364

You deserved it 3 987

Today, I was checking my friends' posts on Facebook and all of them were complaining what a boring night they had. They were all just at my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 552

You deserved it 199