Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw a grasshopper in the urinal so I decided to pee on it. It jumped out, scared the hell out of me, and I peed all over myself. FML
Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML
Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML
Today, I was on the toilet and jumped when I saw a face at the window. It was my own reflection. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to pee on a small bug in the toilet. A much larger bug thought it would be funny to fly into my eye while I was doing this. FML
Today, I was trying to see how far I could get away from the toilet while pissing. Instead I tripped over backwards and pissed all over my face. FML
Today, I saw a big, black spider on the floor of my bathroom. I promptly jumped up on the toilet seat, slipped off, and slammed my head against the wall. The best part? It was a tuft of my hair. FML
Today, after watching Insidious, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to scare me while I was on the toilet. I was in mid-piss when he jumped out at me, and I ran screaming and peeing down the hall. FML
Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
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Top comments
jessxoxo28 5
thats wat u get for trying to pee on a roach
eduardo2k 0
roach 1 - 0 you
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Comments (108)
hairytauren96 0
its better to be piss off then piss on :D haha
TheRealBruce 12
one of those times where the difference between then and than is very important
NOTHAPPENING 0
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW. There was pretty much the exact same one about a grasshopper.
Branflakes16 0
maybe next time u won't try to Piss on roaches huh?
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
quit lying we know it was actually crabs
WOW_idc123 0
thts like when tht one guy wrote an fml on him trying to pee on a bee
mutantcow 0
how would you like it if someone peed on you? >:[
michezlawal 0
uhh... you got that scared from a little roach??
Thelice 0
yes just like grasshoper. I still think about it and laugh!
WTFsGoingOn 0
Seriously, what is with guys peeing on bugs? Just because I can stand and aim while I pee doesn't mean I have to use that fact to amuse myself or my friends. I just see it as a plus that I don't have to worry as much as women do about cold/wet toilet seats and getting poison ivy on my ass when camping. If you want to play with your pee take up "water sports". If you aren't into water sports, stop playing with pee idiot.
baby_gurl2405 0
YDI it isn't cool to piss on a frigging bug...