Today, I saw a cockroach on the ceiling. Immediately I got a stick to smack it down. When I hit it, it fell and landed in my mouth. Karma much? FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Yummy
Today, at lunch, a fly was buzzing around my food. I managed to kill the fly in my napkin in midair. I continued my lunch, pleased with my amazing ninja skills. When I was done with my lunch, I wiped my mouth with the napkin. I can still taste bug guts. Karma. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Those things freak me out
Today, I was cooking dinner when I noticed a cockroach on the kitchen counter. I reflexively tried to spray it with what I had to hand, which was window cleaner, but it seems to have pissed it off and flew right at me instead. I screamed and ran out of the kitchen, leaving the roach in charge. FML
Today, I found a roach in my takeaway. I found it after I felt something hard in my mouth and spat pieces of it back out onto my plate. FML
Today, I was studying for a big test I have next Tuesday in my room. I heard a creak in my ceiling but assumed it was nothing as my house is old. Thirty seconds later something fell from my air vent directly onto my head. It was a giant cockroach. FML
Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML
Today, I saw a roach on my toilet. I thought it would be funny to pee on it. It jumped out, which scared me; I hit my head on the wall and started bleeding, then I peed all over myself and the wall. FML
Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML
Added protein
Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML
Top comments
NATFLUMP 0
OMFG MAN WHY WOULD YOU KEEP YOUR MOUTH OPEN ! dude, you fcking stuuuuuuupid.
prettybadfuckup 0
GROSSNESS
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Comments (132)
daniellybelly 0
You should have ate it. Yum!
CheyA82592 0
Ewwwww, thats nasty.. but its hilarious!
Dreamworld_fml 0
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG SOOOOOOOOO FREAKIN GROSS!!!! AAAAAAHHHHH I would freakin die im serious. I would fork that ****** and roast him over the stove to hear his little screams till he died (only if it wasnt entirely dead from the hit). ALL ROACHES AND MOSQUITOES MUST DIE!!!!!
oOAndrewOo 0
OMG that sucks poor you! EeW!
AttilaLopez 0
note to self, don't knock bugs off the ceiling while opening my mouth. Thanks for the warning in advance :)
giratina16 0
eww scabby bugs i dont think we get roaches here in uk well i havent seen any yet anyway ugh
Shortiiejerksxd 0
lmfao tht must suckkk FYL
piepieburger 0
What do you mean "karma much" Thats good karma! Cockroaches are delicious! scrumdidelyumtious!
iseywisey 0
you kept your mouth open?
tchaikovsky93 0
Lmfaooo nastyyy